A Changing Rose
by Kyrie Star
Summary: What do you do when everything is wrong? What can you do, really when one of your parents aren't really your parents, your best friend is being mysteriously mean and the man you thought you loved with all your heart not only tells you "love fades, mine has" and then gets with someone else the next day? Well I don't know what you would do, but im Rose and I cry, then i get even. RxC
1. Finding Out

It was hard, knowing that the reason I was in so much pain was sitting not even three meters away for me, talking to that bitch Tasha. How could he have done this to me. We were ment to be but he had to go and choose her to be with.

The thing was it wasn't really her fault, but I couldn't help but hate her because she had what I'd always wanted, him, and after that night we spent together after he was changed back i thought that things would go back to how they were.

But after he told me _love fades, mine has _it was all I could do to make it to my room before I broke down crying in front of the entire church. That had been more than 2 months ago, and still the pain hadn't let up. It felt like everything was building inside me, waiting for just the right time to snap and I'd lose myself to not just my anger that he'd strung me along or the anger at Lissa for telling me to back off, no it was the darkness I was waiting for, that was going to be one hell of explosion.

"Rose,"

I looked up in time to see my mother waving her hand at me, as she walked across the cafe she saw him and I saw the anger light up her eyes as she froze right beside me.

"Let it go, mum." I said softly, but even though she had barely heard me, I saw his head snap up and look in our direction. "Lets go, mum. It's too crowded here for my tastes."

"If you're sure honey. We can go to Abe's and catch up there." She replied.

Honestly I thought she would've put up move of a fight but I think seeing how bad things really were with me, with her own eyes, she'd decided that perhaps it was best to do as I wanted, or maybe she just didn't want to be tempted to punch him in the face.

"Sounds good, lets go." I said.

"Come on then." She said as I stood up.

"Is he going to be home or is he out?" I asked, using my fingers to make little quotes around the word "out."

Mum laughed, "He'll be there today, not sure about tomorrow. Why do you ask honey?"

"I've just missed you both is all, I wanted to see you both at the same time anyway, I have some things I want to tell you about."

"Ok, honey."

We walked out and across the courtyard towards the housing area near the south wall, talking about nothing more pressing than what she'd been doing since leaving after graduation. It wasn't much but she had taken down a few more strigoi in that time.

"In all honesty, mum, I don't know how you do it. Looking after people that treat us the way most royals do. I don't really want to do it any more. All that I seem to be doing is paperwork and trust me I know oh so well that I wont be Lissa's guardian so I don't think I should stick around that long."

"If that's how you feel then maybe you should talk to your dad about it."

"Ok mum, lets get moving then." I smiled for the first time in weeks. "I'll race you."

"Your on." She called.

We both ran as fast as we could, but I won in the end, having longer legs than my mum meant that I would have anyway. We were both laughing as we walked into the door.

Dad greeted me with his usual call of "Kiz. How've you been?"

"Can I not answer that." I said evasively.

"Haven't you told him, Rosemarie?" mum asked. "It's not going to change anything, your dad knowing what's been going on. Why haven't you told him?"

I froze in place, much the same way mum had when she saw _him_ in the cafe. "I didn't think it was rellevent to the conversation at the time, though I do think I should have told him earlier." I said, "It's not like everyone doesn't already know that he used me then left me with a broken heart."

"WHAT?!" Dad yelled into the stunned silence that I had produced in my mother. "Adrian did what to my little girl?"

I turned to dad, "Not Adrian, dad. He's been the best to me since all this happened." I sighed, "I never told you why I actually was doing in Baia, did I, dad?"

"No, perhaps you should inform me of what you were doing and why it was there that you were doing whatever it was." he said.

And so I told them the whole story of why I went to Russia, how it was that I came to be caught by _him_ and how I managed to escape and find my way out.

"But Adrian's been the best since I got back dad. But then I found out a way to restore _him _and I took that chance with Lissa's help and then..." I continued on, informing them of all the little things that no-one else seemed to want to know. "And that's when Lissa found me, I thought she'd be the one to help me pull myself together, but all she said was that I was being selfish and that she was glad he didn't want me any more because I only ever thought of myself not anyone else."

"So Belikov used you right before the attack on the school, then got changed and you fought to save him only for him to dismiss everything you've done for him, and state his intentions to protect Vasilisa with his life, and then went on to break your heart further by moving straight into another relationship not even 2 days after telling you that he wasn't in love with you." Dad was increduless, "And you just let him, you're a Mazur, we don't take things lying down,. Forgive me if I'm wrong, but he did this in front of a whole church full of people and you just walked away?"

I nodded, "Yep, dad that's what I did. I couldn't stand to be anywhere near him after that. And I didn't want them to see me cry no-one ever has except Lissa, and now even she wont talk to me. And as if I don't have enough problems, Lissa keeps sending me snarky messages through the bond."

Dad shifted in his seat, "I really wish you had've told me sooner I would've done something about all this stuff that you're going through."

"Abe, maybe it's time we told her the truth."

"Are you sure that this is the right time for that Janine?" He asked, "Does she really need more drama to add to the growing list of things she has to deal with?"

"Well if you were listening you would have heard her say that she basicaly doesn't want anyone to lie to her anymore, so she needs to know the truth." She replied. "Its for the best, Abe."

"Maybe you're right. She does deserve to know, it's her life we messed with after all."

"Excuse me but I am right here and what do you mean, my life you messed with?" I cried out. "I want answers, now!"

"Rose, honey. I love you really I do, you're like a daughter to me and I hate seeing you like this."

"Wait, but I am your daughter, aren't I?"

"Well, you are my step-daughter."


	2. But Wait There's More

"What?!" I said, looking at the woman who I had been brought up to believe was my mother. "What do you mean? Are you telling me you're not my mum?"

"What Janine means, Rose, is that no she's not your mother but she did raise you so she deserves your respect." He seemed nervous, "I am your father and we both love you very much."

"Raised me?! She left me at St. Vlad's when I was 2 and hardly saw me at all!" I yelled, "Now tell me the truth!"

"Rose, please, listen to your father." Janine said.

"Fine, but after this don't expect anything from me. You both lied to me for all of my life, and for that I'll never forgive either of you." I drew a deep breath, "And for that matter I always wondered why I never looked anything like you, Janine, now I know why."

"Rose, don't start a fight please."

I stood up, the chair flipping backwards as I forcefully ejected myself from it, "I should be aloud to start a fight if I want to, you've lied to me my whole life, I've cried myself to sleep wishing my mum cared enough to call once a week, hell once a month would've been better than what I got, but no, not only did I not get a single phone call, but I also didn't get to go anywhere for the school holidays unless it was with Lissa's family. I had no-one but Lis for most of my life, and you expect me to sit there calmly and let you tell me that I was wasting my time, crying over a woman that wasn't even my mother? And you, " I stopped long enough to draw breath and pointed my finger at my dad, "You were never there at all, at least I knew where she was, she was with her charge, and because he is so prominent, I'd have known within a week of her death, you I didn't even know your name until I went to Russia, I didn't know you were my father until I came BACK from Russia. And SHE had to tell me."

"ROSE!" Dad yelled at me, "Sit down and listen, for once in your life listen to someone else!"

"NO!" I yelled right back, "I'm sick of listening to everyone else, they always tell me what to do or what to say or how to act. And I'm done, you hear me DONE!"

I turned and walked out the door leaving behind my stunned father, the woman who had pretended to be my mother and all the respect I ever had for either of them, from now on, I was on my own again, just like I liked it.

As I walked away from the house that held two of the five most important people to me I realised that I only had one person left, and I was about to break his heart and lose him too.

I couldn't take it any more all the anger and frustration were beginning to take their toll on me, so changed my course and started running, taking small strides at first and working my body into a fast paced frenzy as I bolted from the housing area to the gym on the north side of Court, catching the eyes of almost everyone I passed, praying that _he _wouldn't be there so I could let off some steam.

My shoulder collided with the door as I stormed into the gym, causing everyone to look in my direction, but that didn't worry me in the least, I had the punching bags in my sight and I wasn't stopping for anyone. As I strode across the room I pulled my shirt off revealing a black sports bra and kicked off my shoes, knowing full well that I couldn't fight in heals, even the little ones I had on and removed the small silver ring from my pinky on my right hand, causing the darkness to multiply drastically as it was the ring Oksana had charmed for me while I was in Baia. I tucked it into my pocket and rolled my wrists in preparation for the abuse I was about to deal to this unsuspecting bag hanging in front of me.

My fists began to collide with the bag as I imagined the faces of all the people who had wronged me in this life, watching as my fists became a blur and the darkness took over. I lost count after 20  
minutes, and feeling in my hands after half an hour. I was enjoying myself pretending to beat up all the people who had hurt me, or made me angry.

I didn't hear when he came in but I knew the moment he came near me, I had been keeping track of who had come over and I knew it was only a matter of time until he got wind of my attack on the punching bag, but I never thought he'd come to stop me.

"ROSE! For Christ sake, stop it,you're bleeding!"

I spun faster than he thought I could and caught his shoulders, "DON'T tell me what to do Chris, it's all anyone ever does and I can't handle it any more." when I first started talking I was almost yelling by the end my voice was barely a whisper.

I don't know how it happened but I went from being so angry at everyone to trying hard not to burst into tears in-front of all the guardians that had gathered around me. I lifted my hands from his shoulders and picked up my shirt and shoes and turned towards the door.

Only to see _him _standing there in all his glory, I took a deep breath trying not to look like I was about to cry.

His voice whipped through me like lightning, "I guess you don't need me after all."

Christian stepped in before I could form a response, "What's that supposed to mean, Belikov? That she's better off without you because your nothing more than a cradle-snatching, self-centred, chauvinistic, arse-hole and she is an amazing woman that you, the so-called God, used and threw away because you don't know a great thing when it smacks you in the face?"

"No, it means that she's still acting like a child,she's just found someone else to pick up the mess she leaves everywhere she goes."

"Really, is that all you've go to say, because I'm pretty sure she picked up her own shirt and shoes not me, so I guess that's wrong, and like hell I'm going to clean up after someone else, I barely even clean up after myself." He was that angry that I could feel his skin heating up, "Honestly, I don't know what she ever saw in you, you deserve to be with Tasha, she's just as big a fuck-head as you are-."

"Chris, please stop. He can go die in a hole for all I care but please don't get him angry, he might try to hurt you, and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you got hurt because of me." My voice was barely more than a whisper but I knew he heard me because he looked back at me. "Please, Chris, enough. I'm over all the anger. So please."

his skin temperature dropped drastically as I spoke and soon he was back to normal. "Are you sure?" He asked softly, "I wouldn't mind a reason to light him up."

I shook my head, "No, Chris. Please."

"Wait, what's this? I thought you said you didn't clean up after her yet what are you doing right now, she says jump, you say ok. Wow what would the Princess think of this scene right here, let alone your Aunt, Christian you should be ashamed of yourself, falling for her delusions." He grinned , "Maybe she should just die, and stay dead this time, I mean it's not like anyone even wants to be around her, or wants to be with her, not even Adrian, he just wants sex."

He laughed obnoxiously as he walked away.

I stood frozen in place as he left, unable to keep my growing horror off my face, _Adrian didn't love me either? Is that all I am to anyone, a quick fuck?_

Slowly I realised I was still standing in the centre of the gym, with hundreds of eyes on me, waiting for what I'd do next. I felt Christian's hand touch my arm and looked up at him, but that was a big mistake, the pity in his eyes made me want to run screaming of the edge of the tallest building I could find, but I couldn't, there was still people who loved me.

I moved slowly but surely towards the door, Christian following my every step. We made it out the side door before the first of the traitorous tears began to fall, I turned my back on Christian and started to walk away.

"Wait, Rose." His hand snaked out and caught my wrist, "I just wanted to make sure you were ok and what... well I... Rose, what was that in there?"

My voice was choked with tears as I replied, "That's what the darkness does to me, you've never seen it full force, only Jesse, Lissa and Dim- _him _have seen it. It's not pretty, huh?"

"Rose." He said softly as he pulled me round to look at him, "Don't let him get you down, you are more than worth anyone's time. He's an idiot to say those thing about you, especially in public, he's stuffed up everything for himself. Everyone now knows how much of an ass he is."

I ducked my head, unable to look him in the eye, "Chris, I don't want to be here any more. I just want to forget about everything. The monsters in my head and in the streets are starting to get too much for me, for so long I've wanted to be a guardian but now, I just need time to get my head around things."

"I get were you're coming from, here I'll help you to your room, you have a shower and a nap and I'll come wake you in a couple of hours, is that ok?"

"Yeah, ok." I said softly.

We walked to my room together but he left alone, muttering something about making plans. While I went and climbed into my shower and washed my body and my hair. When I was done I climbed out barely dried myself and threw on a singlet and a pair of boot shorts before falling into bed and crashing out.

I was awakened by a hand on my shoulder shaking me awake.

"Rose, wake up and get ready."

"Whaa.. Chris, Whatchu mean by dat?" I said.

"You know how you said you wanted to get away for a while, well lets go."

"What?"

"Get up and get ready. We're leaving in 20 minutes."


	3. Moving On

Sitting in the centre of my small room, packing the few things I had I was beginning to wonder if this was the right thing to do. All I've ever done is run away from my problems or fight tooth and nail for what I thought is right, and now I felt as though I was throwing away everything that ever meant something to me but this was the way it had to be, never had I thought that Janine wasn't my mother yet she actually isn't, I never thought that _he_ could be so cold hearted as to say those things to me, I never thought that the one person who had always stood by me would turn her back on me when I needed her most, but most of all I never thought the person who would come through for me would turn out to be Christian Ozera. He had done so much for me, getting me assigned to be his guardian, organising plane tickets and a small get together of our closest friends so I could say good-bye to the ones I'll miss and hadn't lied to me.

I was nervous about Adrian finding out that I was leaving with Christian, we all knew that when he was drunk we never really knew what he could do, and it worried me because I didn't want Christian getting hurt because of me, he'd done too much for me not to choose him over anyone else.

As I continued packing I heard my door open and Christian sauntered in without his trade-marked grin in place. _He'll talk when he's ready, I'll let him sweat it out for a wile before I say anything. _It was taking forever to pack, but when he woke me up he said I only had 20 minutes which, once I was up, mysteriously turned into 2 hours. As he keep sitting there not saying anything I returned to my inner musings, trying to think if this was the right decision for me at this point in time, when I'd only just graduated from school 3 months ago and had yet to be punished for taking Lissa away from Court grounds, but to add to that I also wanted to go see the friends I had made while I was in Russia, but going there would only remind me of _him_. _Unless I rejoined with Denis and the gang, they'd be glad to hear I'm alive, so would Olena._

Thinking about the Belikovs that had welcomed me into their home and hearts made everything that was going on with _him _all the more real, it was like I never really knew him and he was breaking my heart every time I had to see _him_, _so maybe this will be a good thing, leaving and finding my own way, finding out if _he_was really it for me or is there someone else out there that would love me the way I want to be loved. _Either way my mind was made up, I was leaving, and there wasn't a thing that _him _or anyone else could say that would make me stay.

I knew deep down that I was doing this for some very selfish reasons, but when it comes down to it, the only thing I've ever done for myself was to hunt down _him_ and as much as I wish it hadn't come to that I was glad I did get out and see some of the world. _And maybe, one day I'll go back and see them all, and they'll forgive me for just disappearing like I did._

Leaving everyone I've ever known was going to be hard but Christian was right, it was time to strike out on our own and do some growing up. Neither of us wanted to be near the ones that had broke our hearts, so we were going to set off together, whether or not we can back together was another story.

"So are you packed yet?" Christian's voice knocked me out of my thoughts.

"Almost, just a few little things left and then I'm done. Did you tell Eddie and Mia?" I replied with a question of my own. "I want to say good-bye to them at-least."

"Yeah, I told them. Eddie was almost in tears, but Mia told me they'd both be there." He started fidgeting nervously, "And I saw Adrian on my way here."

"WHAT?" I practically jumped at him. "What did you tell him."

"I told him that I had been granted a guardian and that we were leaving in an hour," He smiled softly, "He said good luck and try to come back in one piece, and didn't even ask about who my guardian was, but he did say to try not to fall in love with her because if I hurt her, you'd hurt me."

I laughed, "Yep, you bet I would kill you if you fell in love with me at all." I glanced at him, "I'd kill you even if you thought about it. You're my best-friend's ex, I can't go there, its against the sister code."

"The sister code?"

"Sisters before misters."

"So like bros before hoes?"

"Yeah, but that's just rude. Anyway I'm done now. How long do we have until the plane leaves?" I was thoughtful for a moment, "And where exactly are we going?"

"Well... the plane leaves in 40minutes, but they're expecting us in 10 and we, my dearest Rosie Posie, are going to visit some friends of mine in a far off country." He had wrapped his arm around my shoulders and was waving his hand in-front of our faces as he said, "And it could all be yours, if you just relax and trust me."

"Trust doesn't come easy to me, Sparky. You of all people should know that." I sighed, "But for you, I'm gonna make an exception. You've helped me the least I can do is trust you."

"Wow, really? Thanks Rose. That means a lot to me, that you're willing to let me make the decisions for now." He squeezed my shoulders again, "If you want to cry, I don't think I'm any good at being someone's "shoulder-to-cry-on" but I'll try for you, because I know some of how you feel, so I'm here for you."

"Thanks, Chris but for now I don't want to cry any more," I grinned at him, "So lets get this show on the road. I'll meet you at the airport with the others, I have a heart to go break."

"Good luck with that, just don't tell him where we're leaving from or that Eddie and Mia know already." He shuddered, "I'm scared of what he could do."

"I guess that makes 2 of us then." I said, "I don't even know how he's going to react to me breaking up with him, I don't think I should tell him I'm leaving just yet, I think I might wait until I'm gone, then call in a couple of weeks, and say..."

"Say what exactly, Rose?"

"Say that the Queen sent me away just after I broke up with him and I wasn't aloud to call until the mission was over." I sighed, it sounded plausible, "And we all know how much the Queen hates me so I'll say that it was really difficult but I finished it. Then say something like, oh my God, I wasn't supposed to say that, I was supposed to say I went on holiday. Then he'll be fine."

"Are you sure about that, he's very good at picking when people are lying?" He asked, "I mean it's good, but what if he sees through the lie?"

"He can only tell you're lying through your aura, he's not the human lie detector." I snorted, "He's more likely to get drunk and not be able to dream stalk me."

"That sounds good." He smirked at me, "Guess that means you'd better get moving, don't want to put that off do you, or have him pining after you while you're gone."

"Or think that I'd been cheating on him while I've been gone, if I do find someone."

He laughed, "Now that would be a interesting conversation to listen in on."

I punched him in the arm as I moved my suitcase to the door, "Just remember, I'm leaving with you which means you're first suspect on his list."

Even though he was Moroi, I saw Christian's skin go paler, "Perhaps not a good idea to, umm, listen in then."

I laughed and shoved him out the door slamming in shut behind us, locking my things in my room.

I walked in one direction as he went in another, it was time for me to break a heart.

Slowly I made my way across from the guardian campus to royal housing, looking for a house I'd only been to once before.

The Ivashkov's family home.

I walked up the steps at a sedated pace, I knew he'd know I was coming, and he'd also know exactly why I was here. I never came here, not after that disaster of a dinner with his parents and the Queen, I shuddered just remembering about it.

I had to force myself to knock on the door, that was a cheerful shade of yellow, it looked as though it had been freshly painted.

Adrian's mum answered the door with yet another cheery thing, a smile and a bright, "Hello dear, Adrian's in his room, I trust you know the way?"

I smiled softly, "Thank you, Lady Daniella. And yes I do."

She ushered me inside with a look that seemed to be contradictory to her to her usual self, it seemed to scream _I'm up to something,_ and that in its self was enough for me to want to bolt back out the door and not bother. But I wasn't here for her, I was here for Adrian.

I walked further into their home as she pushed the door closed behind me. Down along the hallway I walked past new photos, old photos, even paintings of Ivashkovs long gone or long forgotten and into the stairwell that led to Adrian's floor.

As I climbed to the top I had to think about how I was going to break his heart, and how bad we both were going to feel after today. But today had already gone down hill for me, and something told me that it wasn't going to get any better, and I would remember this for the rest of my life.

I pushed open the door to his bedroom, still expecting him to be asleep at this hour,but what I saw truly shocked me.

"Adrian?" I tried to say but the word barely left my lips before it was lost to the noises coming from his bed, and that's when it hit me.

_He _had been right, Adrian was only after sex, the woman in his bed with him was proof to that statement. I had thought that he had truly loved me and when I did move on it would be him I fell in love with, but this right here validated my need to break up with him.

"Oh, Adrian. That felt so good. Do it again."

_That voice, I'd know it anywhere._

"How could you..?" I screamed at them and watched as Adrian leapt off the bed.

"Rose? It's not what you-."

"Don't give me that bull shit, Adrian. We're all adults and I'm not blind, but with her how could you!" I took a deep breath, "You know what, both of you. I kind-of expected this, after all Adrian, you've never been faithful in your life, and you, you cheated on the only guy who wanted to be with you for you."

"Don't speak to her like that!"

"I'm not sorry for what I said, but just so you both know and well, I don't have to go find you since you're here anyway. I'm leaving in 3 hours to start my duty as Lord Ozera's Guardian." I couldn't help but smirk, thinking of how Christian would have reacted to me calling him Lord, "I do wish you both the worst in your lives and do have a nice day, Lord Ivashkov, Princess Dragomir."

With my words still echoing in the now silent chamber, I turned and walked back down the stairs and out into the night.

My footsteps rebounded back to me as I ran back to my room, pulling the key from my pocket as I went. I wasn't going to cry I just didn't want to be where they could find me, and my room would be their number one spot to start looking.

The fresh air felt great on my face as I ran, I was free, there was nothing left here stopping me from moving on with my life. I did a little dance of joy as I got to my room only to see that someone was indeed waiting to see me, and I felt my heart skip as he grinned at me.

"I got them to take your things to the plane, everyone's waiting at the cafe to say good-by."

I laughed, already feeling the weight and stress lifting off my shoulders. "Come on then. We don't want to be late to our own farewell party!"


	4. After Darkness Has Fallen

We walked up the front steps and again, he grabbed my hand. We'd been travelling for about 4 years when he asked me where I'd like to go.

* flash back *

"_Ok, so we've travelled all over the southern hemisphere, as well as over Asia and half of Europe, been and visited my Uncle and my cousins and now I'm thinking that we should go see someone you want to." he grinned, "is there anyone you want to go see, like anywhere?"_

"_Um, well there's some people I met when I was hunting for _him_and they don't know that I'm alive, so maybe we could go see them," I shrugged. "If you want to that is, we don't have to."_

"_Well if they don't know that you're alive, maybe we should go see them, do you think they'll let us stay with them or will we have to get a hotel?"_

"_They'll let us stay, trust me." I shoved him, gently "Thanks for this dude."_

"Are you sure they'll let me stay?" He asked for the millionth time, "What if they don't like me?"

"Yes they'll let you stay, and of cause they'll like you, Olena will be glad of an excuse to cook heaps, she loves to feed people."

I raised my hand and knocked hard on the old oak door.

"Just a minute, I'm in the kitchen!" Came a call from inside.

My heart sped up as I heard a voice I'd longed to hear in ages, I switched feet hoping that she'd hurry up and come to the door.

I watched as the door was pulled open from inside and there she was.

"Roza?" her voice was soft and uncertain,"Is that really you?"

"Olena, it's so good to see you again!" I cried as I lunched myself into her open arms, "of cause it's me, and besides, who else could ever think to look this good?"

She laughed as she pulled back to check my appearance, "You need to eat more my dear, come I will feed you, black bread and butter."

"Wait Olena," I turned slightly, revealing Christian standing slightly behind me, "This is Christian, he's a very close friend of mine and he's my charge. We've been travelling around for the last couple of years and he asked where I'd like to go and I said here so here we are. Do you mind if he stays as-well?"

"Of cause he's more than welcome, you are like family to us Roza and family can have guests over whenever they want, but you, Christian, are the most skinniest boy I have ever seen. You need to eat a lot more if you wish to keep up with Roza here." she grinned, "Come on out of the heat, I'll find you both something to drink and that black bread too."

We walked inside and I pointed to the photos of Dimitri on the wall as we went, Christian had a good laugh at one were he was wearing full cowboy attire, I had laughed at that one the first time I saw it too. But what was a big surprise to me was a photo that dominated the space above the fire-place.

It was a large photo of me, sitting beside a bonfire, holding a glass of what looked like water and talking animatedly with tears in my eyes. Looking closer I could see that I had tear tracks on my cheeks and my hair wasn't brushed properly.

"Is that you, Rose?" Christian asked, "You look so..."

"Yeah that's me, when I came to Russia the first time, for Dimitri." I remembered the reason for the gathering and touched my picture lightly. "It was Dimitri's funeral, and they asked me to talk about him."

"You looked so beautiful that night, Roza. Wearing your grief for all to see and telling us about how brave he was when he fought in the battle at your school." A wise old voice sounded from the chair in the corner, "You didn't need to tell us but we could all see the love you had for him. But when he was restored he messed up."

We had spun around to see where the voice was coming from, but I already knew.

"Yeva, it's good to see that you've given up trying to torment me." I grinned, "How's everything going, how are the babies?"

"Дети это хорошо, хотя, когда Вика возвращается домой, она будет несколько для вас, и маленький Поль был скучаю по тебе, как сумасшедший. Так что имейте в виду, вы будете очень заняты в ближайшее время. Вы хотели на кухне." She laughed.

"I'm gonna sound like an idiot, but what's a Roza?" Christian asked.

I laughed, the first true laugh to come from my mouth in years, "It's my name in Russian, it stuck when I was here last and now, I kinda like it. Come on, she said we're wanted in the kitchen."

"But how does.." "Roza, Christian! Kitchen, now please!" Olena called.

"Я сказал вам." came Yeva's voice from behind us with a chuckle.

I smiled as we walked into the kitchen, just as Olena put what looked like a fresh loaf of black bread on the table, and my mouth started to water.

"Oh, Olena, have I told you lately how much I loved you?" I was moving to the table already when she replied.

"No, but it's nice to know that you do love me and that you haven't been entirely corrupted by the fast food chains that have set up shop all over the world." she laughed. "We have missed you a lot Roza, and then the way you left last time you were here... I'm so ashamed of Vika for her actions, she had no right to tell you-."

"It's ok, Olena, you don't need to apologise, under the circumstances it's possible I would have reacted the same way she did, but it's not up to you to say sorry for you daughter's actions, and I already forgave her before I left." I smiled at Olena, "It's too hard to hold onto anger when you're doing something out of love and I know that she was just angry."

We turned to the food and I showed Christian how to get a piece without it crumbling to pieces, put butter on it and get it into my mouth without it leaving my fork.

"Now, Rose. You really need to learn to-."

Christian's words were cut off by the front door opening and a voice calling out, "Mama, we're home and already Vika and Paul have had a fight!"

I grinned at Olena, "Can I?" I mouthed.

She grinned and nodded, "Just don't scare Vika too much."

I grinned and jumped up from my seat and dashed down the hall and into the lounge room before they got there, and sat in Yeva's chair. I saw Christian in the door way, watching with Yeva just behind him and gave them a thumbs up sign.

"Хм .. Что у нас здесь? Мне интересно, если вы пропустили меня." I said, loudly. "I wonder if you think I'm dead?"

I tried not to laugh as there was the sound of running feet and a very happy looking Paul bounced round the corner and screamed out "Roza!" when he saw me.

I laughed and braced myself for the onslaught of female bodies that lunched themselves at me when they rounded the corner.

"Roza!" they all called, just like Paul.

I opened my arms and ended up caught in the middle of the 3 girls and a young man, while they all squealed and tugged at me, and constantly telling me they were glad I was there, I replied in kind and told them I'd tell them about where I'd been soon, I just wanted to see how they'd changed.

"Karo, how are you and Zoya doing?" I started at the oldest, might as well work my way through the family as I had already heard from Olena how she was and Yeva too.

"Good, Zoya started school last year and has already got in a few fights." she laughed, "She sure reminds me of you, I think you rubbed off on her when you babysat for me that time."

"Really, ha." I laughed, "If she's anything like me, there's worse to come. What about you, Sonja, hows that little one of yours, he's a boy if I remember correctly?"

"Yes, yes. Aleski, is my amazing baby boy. He's just as much trouble at school as Zoya is, the only difference is, he gets in trouble for not doing his school work." she grinned, "Don't tell him this, but no matter what he does, he'll always be my little angel. But yeah, we're both good, been having lots of fun waiting for the summer to end."

I laughed along with her, and turned to ask Vika how she was, but I realised that she wasn't there. I started looking but before I could get far a male voice cut through my thoughts.

"She went up stairs, Rose. She said there's so many things she wants to say to you but most are private, so she said to talk to the others and when you're done come to her room."

I grinned at Christian, "Thanks dude. Umm, what time will Becca be calling?"

"She said at 7 tonight. Which means around 4 this arvo here, I think." He grinned, "She always calls at the same time."

I laughed, "Yeah but I can't work out the time difference, so I just ask you. So Paulo, hows school and have you got a girlfriend yet?"

His face went a bright red as I talked, "School's ok. Getting tougher especially since the age decree is still in-force. If it stays, I'll be out next year." He seemed a little scared of the prospect. "And no I don't have a girl. Though I have had my eye on this one awesome chick for a few years now."

"Umm. Roza, who's this Becca chick that's gonna steal your attention after 4?" Karo asked.

I glanced at Christian, my face displaying my anxiety about this question, he wasn't any help though, he just shrugged his shoulders and motioned for me to answer the woman.

"Becca is Christian's cousin and she's a very good friend of mine. She constantly worries that one of us are gonna get hurt so she calls at the same time every day so that we know when to have the phone close by and then if we don't answer, she knows that something has happened to us." I sighed, "I also like talking to the little girl in her care."

Christian nodded, "Yeah, Carla is a little fire-cracker, just like her parents."

I jabbed my elbow into his ribs. "No, she's a really good fighter, and I'm glad she's got somewhere to stay, only I wish her parents were able to look after her themselves."

Christian's hand slid into mine and gave a small squeeze, "Maybe if they were older they could've raised her on their own, but they didn't know what they were doing."

"What do you mean?" Sonja asked.

"Carla's mum and dad couldn't look after her because no-one knows when her mother's going to snap and hurt someone and they didn't want her to get hurt by accident. And her dad couldn't do it on his own and he had made a promise to her mum to never leave her side so he helps the mum keep her temper and they both don't get to see her." I could feel the tears coming to my eyes, but Christian squeezed my hand again and I knew he felt the same. "I might go see what Vika's doing." I said as I stood up and walked away.

I heard Christian behind me, "She wishes that she could look after Carla herself, because she knows what its like to grow up with no parents and Janine's not even her real mum."

* Flash Back *

_My phone ringing woke me up at 2 in the morning, I didn't even bother to check the caller I.D, I knew who it would be, and boy would he be pissed off._

"_Rosemarie, how dare you just take off like that, don't you have any sense of responsibility? I thought you were raised better than that."_

"_Look, old man. Can you cut the crap and get to the point, I was asleep."_

_He spluttered for a moment before speaking again. "I just wanted you to know that your birth mother's name is Selena, and she's- well she _was- a_Bardica. And before you ask the reason you don't need to drink blood is because of a genetic glitch in your DNA that means you don't need to drink blood, however you are Moroi and it's not just the darkness that you pull for Lissa that makes you flip out it's your own."_

"_Wait, what?" I was dumbfounded._

"_You're not a damphir, you're Moroi. And we kept your magic under control by putting a device under your skin." His voice was low. "We're all very sorry."_

"_Your __**SORRY**__?" I had found my voice again. "This is my life you've been messing with, what do you think I am? Some kind of science experiment? I'm a person and you've used me to do what you want to and kept it all from me. How could you do this to your own daughter, your own flesh and blood? And then you have the guts to tell me you're __**SORRY**__? Forget that, please don't call me again, if I want you in my life then I'll call you."_

_After I hung up, I cried until I felt familiar arms encircle my shoulders, I grabbed Christian's shirt and pulled him closer, my sobs drowning out anything he said._

_I took a while for me to calm down and when I did, Christian was still holding me, I looked up at him and looked at me and I whispered "Get me something to drink please, I just wanna forget all the stress for the last few months, Chris, please?"_

_And the rest of that night was history._

"What about you?" Sonja's words pulled me out of my reverie.

"She reminds me of me, because my aunt raised me after my parents turned of their own free will. I wish there was something we could do." He replied.

I moved up the stairs, still thinking about that night, the way Christian's arms had felt around me, the way his hands were strong yet soft holding me just the right way, the way his lips felt on mine-

_That's enough of that, it might have felt right but we both know it was a mistake and it's not going to happen again. It was nothing more than a drunken mistake_ I told myself, and it had been, and we never would, he still loved Lissa, and I still loved _him._

I walked down the hallway and stopped outside Vika's door, I knocked softly.

"Vika, can I come in?" I asked through the door.

It opened in front of me and I saw the girl who I had always seen as my little sister.

"You shouldn't have to ask, you're more than welcome in my room." She seemed nervous, "Its ok."

As I walked in and took a seat I looked around, there were photos dominating most of her room, photos of her and her friends, the Belikovs and even Denis and the crew, but the photos that stood out the most to me were the ones that had me in them, most of them were taken before I got caught and taken back to school with Lissa, but there were others that Christian had taken and sent to Mia and Eddie. I wondered where she had got them.

"I hope you don't mind but I went to Court and your friends gave me some." She sat down on the bed and patted the space next to her, "Roza, I just wanted to say that I'm so sorry, I-"

I cut her off before she could keep talking. "It's ok, I forgave you right after you said it."

She smiled, "Really? I was sure that you hated me."

"I could never hate you, you're like a sister to me."

We sat like that talking for hours and just as we got up to go down to help with dinner, laughing about how Christian sucks on his thumb while he sleeps, my phone rang.

"I gotta get this." I said, "Can you tell Christian that Becca's calling, please?"

"Sure, if you take too long, do you want me to put your dinner in the oven so it stays warm?" She asked.

"Yeah that'd be great. Thanks."

She walked down the stairs as I answered my phone with a chirpy "Hello."

"Hello, Rose. It's nice to know that you're ok, is Chris ok too."

I laughed as the person in question ran up the stairs and almost knocked me over. "Yeah he's fine, just give me a minute to get somewhere quiet so we can talk."

"Ok." she laughed, "Was that Chris I just heard?"

"Yep," I said with another laugh.

"He sounds like a one man herd of elephants."

I laughed again as I shut the door to what had once been _his_ room, but now was mine, "Ok, so we're somewhere that we can talk freely."

"Put me on speaker, I have some news for both of you that you're not going to like." she said, all traces of laughter gone from her voice. "It's about Carla."

I quickly pulled the phone away from my ear and pressed the loud speaker button, "Ok, tell us now what's going on."

"Well long story short, I can't enrol Carla in school because I'm not her parent and unless I adopt her I can't. But then they told me that she has to go to school, or I would lose her then they went on to say that they will be taking her to Court to do a blood test so they can locate her birth parents so they can enrol her." she took a deep breath, "And now I don't know what to do."

"If they can't find her they can't do crap." Christian said. "Find somewhere to hide her at and then they can't take her off you."

"They've got us under constant surveillance, I can't even go to the shops by myself." she replied.

"Now that we know the problem can I talk to her?" Christian asked.

"Sure." Becca said. "When you've both spoken to her we'll talk more about what we can do."

"Ok." Christian said. "Why don't you go eat your dinner while I talk first ok?" He asked me.

"Sure." I said and left him to eat.

When I was done I walked back up stairs to hear Christian say, "I know that your mummy loves you so very much, she misses you every day."

"Hey Chris." I said softly.

He looked up, and smiled at me, "Are you done now?" He asked.

"Yeah, is she ready to talk to me?"

"Yeah," He said and turned his head slightly, "Bye sweetie, I'll talk to you tomorrow."

I heard a faint, "Bye, sleep well."

I took the phone sat on the bed and watched as Christian stood and walked out the room.

"Hey, Carla. How's your day been?" I asked. "Did you have a good day?"

"Of-course I did, Becca and Lee took me to the park and Sammy was there, and we played dolls and trucks..."

As she spoke I listened well, I wanted to know everything about this little girl. We talked for an hour before she got called to go to bed.

"I gotta go to bed now," I could hear the pout in her voice.

"Well you better do as you're told, be a good girl for Becca." I said. "Я люблю тебя, мой прекрасный ангел. Девочка мамы."

I heard a gasp behind me, but I paid no attention to it.

"I love you, too, mama. I'll see you soon, wont I? Mama?" She sounded tired.

"Of-course you will honey." I smiled into the phone. "Good night baby."

"Good night, mama." She said and handed the phone back to Becca.

"I'll be there to get her tomorrow." I said.

"Are you sure Rose?" She asked, "If you do this they'll-"

"Yeah, they'll all know, I don't care, I'm sick of missing out on what should be my right, I should be there." I sighed, "I'll be there, see you Becca."

I hung up the phone and turned around to face the music.

"You have a daughter, Roza?"

Russian - "Дети это хорошо, хотя, когда Вика возвращается домой, она будет несколько для вас, и маленький Поль был скучаю по тебе, как сумасшедший. Так что имейте в виду, вы будете очень заняты в ближайшее время. Вы хотели на кухне."

Translation - "The babies are fine, though when Vika gets home she'll be a handful for you, and little Paul has been missing you like crazy. So be warned you'll be very busy soon. You're wanted in the kitchen."

Russian - "Я сказал вам."

Translation – "I told you."

Russian - "Хм .. Что у нас здесь? Мне интересно, если вы пропустили меня."

Translation - "Hmm.. What do we have here? I wonder if you missed me at all."

Russian - "Я люблю тебя, мой прекрасный ангел. Девочка мамы."

Translation - "I love you, my beautiful angel. mama's baby girl."


	5. Sorry, but this is an AN

**i know how much i used to hate when people did this in the middle of a story but there are people asking questions.**

**ok so for those of you who are confused, there is a reason behind everything I write, but just a few little sneak peaks.**

**yes to both questions about Dimitri.**

**and as for who the father is, that fill be answered at the end of the next chapter.**

**and Rose will end up with the least likely person you think**


	6. Love, Happiness and a BIG Problem

I turned to see Vika standing in the doorway.

"Yeah, I do. She's beautiful and amazing and I was told that she'd be safer there but now, that's changed because of idiots telling her carer what she can and can't do. Oh it just makes me so angry!" I slammed my hand down on the bedside table, and then started to dial a number I swore I'd never call again, "I gotta make this call, you can stay but please be quiet."

"Ok, Roza. I'll be quiet." She replied.

The phone rang 3 times before it was answered with a brisk, "Mazur speaking."

"I need a favour, old man." I said, "I need a plane at Novabrisk airport in half an hour, set to go to New South Whales, Australia."

"Anything else Rose."

"It's been 3 years since that conversation Baba, but I'm not sure I'm ready to deal with the fall out from that." I sighed, "I just need to go very soon."

"As luck would have it, I actually am in Russia right now, so you are more than welcome to use my plane, Kiz." He took a deep breath, "It'll be there when you need it, how many are travelling?"

I glanced at Vika, the question in my eyes, she nodded quickly.

"There will be 3 of us, Baba. And we'll be staying over night on the plane, picking up another person then returning immediately."

"To Novabrisk?" He asked.

"Yes, to Novabrisk, I'm spending some time with some old friends of mine." I laughed, "Don't worry daddy dearest, I know what I'm doing now days, so please don't lecture me this time."

"So long as you know what you're doing, I'll keep my comments to myself."

"Does that include keeping my where-abouts to yourself?" I asked, "I really don't want my time with my extended family cut short because of Lissa's meddling."

"I will keep my mouth firmly shut on the matter of your where-abouts." He said, "I wont even tell Janine, though she's been very worried about you since you left."

"Yes well, she'll have to get over it, when I'm ready to speak to her I will. When I get back, you are welcome to come see me but if you bring up my past from before I left, you wont be welcome anywhere near me or my family, is that clear?"

"Crystal clear, daughter." He replied.

I could hear the strain in his voice. He was angry that I was telling him what to do, _he'll understand why it's necessary soon enough, and he'll be wrapped around her little fingers too._

"Well, then I guess I'll see you when I get back from my trip." I said.

"I guess you will, if you want." "I would like to see you again. Even if it is just for a proper good bye."

"Ok then, I will met you at the airport, after you've been to Australia."

I hung up and turned to Vika, "Go pack an over night bag. And something to keep you entertained, I don't want any complaints of 'I'm bored' ok?"

"Ok, but what are you going to tell mama, you only just got here and now you're taking off again and you're taking me with you."

"I'll tell her that we're going to take you on a trip to get someone very important to me and to spend time with you and that we'll be back before she knew it. Does that sound good to you?"

"Yeah. Do you want me to get Christian to come up here so you can tell him?"

"That would be great actually, because we gotta talk."

Vika walked off down stairs and left me to pack my over-night bag alone. I had just finished when Christian walked in with his trade-marked grin in place.

"So Vika came down stairs bouncing up and down about you saying that you had planned a couple of days to hang out and that as I was your charge I had to come too, but it was ok because I was girly enough for it." his grin changed to one of pure evil, "So, I guess that means I'm gonna tickle you until you tell me the truth."

He jumped at me and pinned my arms above my head with one hand the other started tickling my sides and stomach making me laugh and twitch beneath him as he pressed his legs onto mine holding them down as-well. I started screaming out for him to stop but he just laughed at me, so I went for one of the moves I knew and managed to flip us over, so now he was on the bottom, his black and blue shirt riding up under his arms showing his surprisingly well-toned body.

I slowed my movements watching his now bare chest rise and fall in exhaustion from our tickle fight, he flipped us again and leaned down over me.

My breath caught in my throat as I looked up at him, "Chris." I whispered.

He looked at me and seemed as stunned as I was at how close we'd gotten. "Rose." He said back.

"I..."

"I know."

"But if we..."

"I know, Rose..."

Neither of us realised how close we were until our lips touched, my breath caught again as I looked at him. He lifted his head and looked into my eyes, watching me, trying to see what my reaction would be. What he saw in my eyes must have encouraged him because he leaned back down and pressed his lips on mine again, the kiss went from soft and gentle to fierce and passionate very quickly, his hands pressing into my sides. I reached up and put my arms around his neck pulling down onto me, and wrapped my legs around him, pushing his growing hardness against my core.

He moved his lips from mine and trailed kisses down my face and onto my neck and chest, causing me to moan.

"Well I'm... Oh, umm, I'll come back."

I gasped and pushed Christian off me, "Wait I'm ready, we're just waiting on Chris to get his stuff together, he, umm distracted me."

"Well if that's what you're calling it now days. Hurry up, it's been almost half an hour since you called, we should get moving if we're gonna be there on time." Vika grinned, "Unless you want me to wait for you?"

My face flushed bright red, "I'm ready to go now, but Sparky here is stalling. He wont pack a bag."

"I'm stalling? Where are we going anyway?"

"It's a surprise," I said, before Viktoria could say anything. "So are you coming on a road trip with us or are you gonna stay here with people you don't know?"

"Yeah, I'm coming, just give me a minute to pack my bag."

"You'll only need enough fr a couple of days, were not going for long." Vika said.

"She's right." I said, "We'll meet you in the car."

Vika and I took our bags down stairs and said our good-byes to the family. Yeva pulled me aside for a brief chat.

"Don't stress too much and trust in Vika's abilities, and you will be fine." she was thoughtful for a moment, "Don't let your guard down and don't let them take her from you. You wont see her again if you do."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, but she had already walked away.

Vika caught my hand pulled me out into the street and over to mine and Christian's car, chattering the whole time.

"It's going to be so great getting out on my own, I mean not really on my own, but without having to be watched constantly by everyone. Like I know you'll watch me, but you'll let me have some freedom, unlike my sisters." she paused to catch her breath. "And then there's going to be Christian there and if you want I can help you watch him, like he's not like most Moroi but he still should be watched, I don't want him jumping you while I'm there."

"What was that you just said about me?" Christian said, jumping into the back of the car. "I heard my name being said, so what was it?"

"Nothing you need to worry about now. Are you both ready because once we leave we're not coming back until she's here with us?"

"Until who's here?" Christian asked. "I don't like being in the dark, Rose you know that."

"Don't worry about it, we're leaving now so you'll find out in about 35-40 minutes."

he sat back and grumbled the whole way to the airport about how I was hiding stuff from him and that I was being selfish for not telling him.

I was so glad when we got there because he finally shut up and I told him that once we were on the plane, I'd fill him in completely on what we were going to do.

After being checked over by Abe's goons we were aloud onto the plane, we went on board and got comfortable, Christian sitting on one side of the office table and Viktoria sat on the on the other side, and swung her feet up only giving my the option of sitting next to Christian or staying standing while the plane taxied down the runway, I sat next to Christian.

"Ok so, it's going to take us about 19 – 20 hours to travel to Port Macquarie to get Carla-."

"Is that what we're doing?" Christian asked, "You're gonna step up and look after her now?"

"Yes. And now this discussion is over. I'm going for a sleep."

I moved off the seat and down the walkway to the sleeping section, before I even lay down I could hear footsteps following me down the plane, _Christian, _I thought to myself.

His head popped round the corner, "I'm sorry for what I said it was uncalled for, and I should be supporting you right now, when you need it most." He hung his head. "It didn't come out the way I wanted it to. Rose?" He lifted his head and looked me in the eye, finally seeing my own indecision about what we were about to do. "Hey, don't freak on me now."

"But what if I stuff up? What if, I get her hurt, or worse? I'll never be able to forgive myself if something happened to her because of my own stupidity."

"You wont 'stuff up' you're a great mum, it's just the darkness that you take from that bitch Lissa, it makes you flip. I was talking to Yeva and she said that there is a way to break the bond."

"What?" I launched myself from the side of the bed that I had been sitting on.

"Don't get excited. It involves you dying again. But this time spirit can't bring you back, you have to do it on your own." he frowned, "And we can't lose you. So that's completely out of the question."

"Oh," I said and sat back down. "Well I'm going to sleep before this ring wears off and the ghosts attack me."

"Do you want me to stay with you?"

"Please don't leave me." I whispered, and grabbed his hand.

He moved back the blankets on the other side of the bunk and climbed in behind me, he stayed sitting up for a minute and I was about to ask him what he was doing when I realised he had pulled his shirt up over his head and dropped it on the floor with his shoes.

I moved over a little so he'd have more space and he caught my hips with his hands.

"Please, don't move away from me." He whispered, right next to my ear. "I don't mind being close to you, that is if you don't mind."

"I don't mind, Chris. Just don't go too far after I fall asleep please."

"Ok." he said. He pulled me back so my back was pressed against his chest and my hips where cradled against his.

I was almost asleep when I felt his lips press on my shoulder and his soft breath on my neck, "I miss this, being able to hold you. I wish I had the guts to say this to you when you're awake." He sighed. "I know I don't love _her _any more, but I think I love you, I remember when I used to hold you in my arms every night when we first left and how you used to talk and cry in your sleep, what they'd done to you made me so angry I wanted to go back and make them feel the same pain they made you feel. But you needed me and I couldn't leave you, it not that I couldn't physically leave I just didn't want you to hurt any more, I wanted to see you smile again. I know now why I couldn't leave and why it was so important to me to see you smile, it's because I messed up our promise, I fell in love with you."

I rolled over, thinking that it was just a dream, and felt him stiffen beneath my hands. I pressed myself into his arms and draped one of mine over his waist. I snuggled into his chest and he relaxed. I let the darkness cover me and fully pull me under as the plane kept moving down the runway.

I awoke to Christian's soft voice in my ear, "Rose, it's time to get up, we about to land soon."

"Ok, I'm up," I rolled over and looked at Chris, only to see that he still didn't have his shirt on and there was a tattoo on the left side of his chest. "When did you get that?" I asked.

He glanced down and I swear his cheeks flamed bright red before he turned away from me, "About a year ago." He said, "Now come on time to get up."

I climbed off the bed and touched his shoulder, "Why are you being evasive about it?"

He pulled his shirt back over his head and turned to me. "Because I don't want you to get angry at me."

"Chris, why would I get angry? You're the only one who stood by me." I sighed, "I just don't like when people keep things from me."

"I didn't think you'd get so defensive about this." He looked angry.

"It's ok." I said and turned away, "I just thought we shared everything. We should go see what Vika's doing."

I walked out and into the main section of the plane and toward the sitting area, where I could see Vika reading the latest fashion magazine. It hurt, thinking that Christian didn't trust me enough to show me what was so important that he would get it tattooed on his chest. I couldn't understand why he was hiding something from me. _Unless it's Lissa's name. But he said he only got it a year ago, so if it is then he's still in love with her, _I sighed, part of me had wanted last night's dream to be real, another part of me still hoped that Dimitri still loved me and that he had been under compulsion all this time and then the last part of me kept telling me that it'd be best if maybe I didn't fall in love again.

"Rose, wait." Christian's voice called me out of my thoughts.

"What is it, Chris?" I said softly, "I don't want to fight with you."

"No fighting, I promise Rose." He shifted from one foot to the other, "I'm just not ready to show anyone yet, but I promise when I am, you'll be the first person I show."

"Ok," I said, "We'd better get seated before the plane lands."

We walked over to where Vika was sitting and she instantly started talking about this celebrity or other and how they were due to have a baby or they were getting married.

"So what about you 2?" she smiled at us, "When are you going to announce your getting married?"

"What?" I basically yelled at her, then I turned to Christian, "Did you have something to do with this? I can't believe this."

"No I didn't Rose." he said, "Are you ok?"

"Not really, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have jumped at you." I started rubbing my temples, I could feel the darkness multiplying, causing me to get a headache. "I guess I'm just having a bad day."

"Is your ring wearing off?" Chris asked. "I should have realised that it would even when you're asleep."

"Yeah, but it's ok, I just need to get on firm ground and focus on rebuilding my walls." I sighed.

Christian reached over and wrapped his arm around me. "It'll be ok, I'll ask Becca if she can re-charm your ring. I don't know how strong it will be though."

I smiled up at him, "Oksana didn't use much energy to make this one and it's lasted me, what? A good 4 years now and it's only just wearing down now, I thought that I would have needed a new one by now. So we should be right."

Christian laughed. "That's true."

"Ok, so let me get this straight. Not even 2 minutes ago you were fighting now you're laughing and talking about helping each other and... I just don't get it." Vika looked confused. "Explain, now."

I glanced at Christian and he shrugged. "Ok so it's like this, we've only had each other most of the time, because we've been on our own. So we may get angry at each other but we can't hold onto that anger because it could get us both killed. So we laugh it off, that and we're so used to each other that the little things don't worry us much any more."

"Oh." She said, "So we'll be landing soon. Maybe we should put on our seatbelts?"

"Yep." Christian replied.

We sat and waited while the plane landed and then we made a plan.

"Ok so, it's night time here, so we've gotta be extra careful, especially after we get Carla. I don't want any one to get their hands on her, not until we know how her power will manifest, and I don't want her to be put under any stress or things will happen." I glanced at Christian and he nodded. "It used to happen when she was a baby and it was pretty weird then."

"Ok so lets move."

We climbed out of the plane and into a waiting car, I was driving while Christian sat in the passenger seat and Vika was in the back.

It was a long drive out past the shops and onto the highway towards the small town of Wauchope, where Carla and Becca lived with Becca's partner Lee and their 2 children, Steph and Jamie.

We pulled up into the driveway and I cut the engine and jumped out, eager to see my beautiful little girl. I could see Christian a step behind me, hurrying to see Carla too.

We hurried up the steps and both knocked on the door at the same time. We both started laughing about it. Vika quickly joined us, grinning about our exuberance.

"Just hold your horses, I'm coming," Came a reply from inside, in a voice I knew all too well.

I laughed as she pulled the door open muttering about people visiting at silly hours.

Becca took one look at us and her hand flew to her chest in surprise. "Oh, my. Rose, Chris. You really did come." She said, "Come in, come in. Out of this cold weather."

We laughed again, "It's not that cold," I said. "Where's Carla?"

"Your little ангел is in the bath right now. But when she's done you can get her out. Are you leaving tonight?" She responded. "If so, we'll have to pack her suitcase."

"Once she's out we have to leave, I told Abe that we were just coming to pick someone up then we were going again, he's expecting us back in Russia." I sighed. "Let's go pack her bag then I'll get her out and dressed and give you a minute to say good-bye."

"Ok."

Christian went to go see what Lee was doing and Vika fallowed Becca and I to Carla's room. I introduced Vika to Becca and we talked about what we were going to do on the way back to the plane, how we were gonna sit and what was going to happen if we get attacked.

"I think I should drive so you can sit in the back with Carla, we all know that you're the best choice to protect her, and I can keep an eye on Christian if we do then everyone's covered." Vika said.

I nodded, "That sounds like a good idea but remember, Christian is a hands on charge, he'll help you out as much as he can by distracting your opponents with his magic and don't worry too much if they get past, he knows how to kick their butts."

Becca laughed, "Yeah kick their butts and then some. It's time for Carla to get out of the bath, Rose, her towel is the pink one that you bought her on the rack."

I grinned, jumped up and rushed to the bathroom.

"Carla honey, it's time to get out now." I said as I opened the door.

"Mama!" she screamed and jumped out of the bath. "I knew you'd come to see me!"

I caught her up in my arms, not caring that she was dripping wet and was soaking my clothes. I lifted her head and looked in her eyes. She smiled at me and wiggled in my arms.

"Mama, I is getting you all wet."

"That's ok ангел, I don't mind. Mummy has missed you too much to care darling. Do you want to come live with mummy?" I asked as I grabbed her towel and wrapped her up. "Mummy would like you too, I do miss you so much when you're here and I'm not."

"Yeah mummy, I wanna live with you and daddy." she was bouncing up and down smiling from ear to ear. "We can live anywhere mummy just as long as you and daddy are there I'll be happy mummy."

I froze, _she wants her dad. What do I do?_ "I'll have to ask daddy, baby."

She pouted at me, "But daddy does love me, doesn't he?"

"Of cause he loves you, baby." I smiled at her, "Let's go get you dressed, then you can meet your Auntie Vika."

We went into Carla's room that she shared with Steph and got her dressed into some warm clothes; pants that had zips under the knees so she can unzip them, and a light shirt with a thick jacket over the top.

Once she was dressed we went out into the lounge room where Vika, Lee and the kids were waiting for us.

"Where's Christian?" I asked. "Don't tell me he walked off on his own."

"No, he said he was going to check the wards," Lee said, "Becca went with him to show him where the points are. But that was a while ago now."

"Shit."


	7. Catching and Keeping

"You let 2 Moroi go out, after dark, by themselves, and the wards might be down?"

"Christian said it would be fine." Lee said. "And you say that we should listen to him more often."

"Yeah I know, Ok. So where's the recover point?"

"At the back of the garden." Lee replied.

"Shit, stay here. Vika keep the house covered, I'll be back in a minute." I glanced between Vika and Lee, I didn't want to do this, Vika's so young and Lee's never seen a fight in his whole life let alone fought against strigoi.

An old but wise voice sounded in my head, _Trust in Vika's abilities and you'll be fine._

I quickly formed a plan in my head, _if we get out of this, I'll tell Carla who her dad is, and I'll tell him he has a daughter._

"If I'm not back in ten minutes I want you to take the kids to the plane. Lee, you know how to get to the airport. Vika you know which plane it is. If we don't call within half an hour of getting there, leave. Tell my dad everything but do not come back Vika. Do you understand? I can get us back on my own. But I swear to God if anything happens to the kids I will personally hunt down whoever hurts them and go all Hunter on them."

"What do you mean, Hunter?"

"When I was in Russia looking for your brother, after we had our fight I joined with Denis' gang and lets just say we hunted down 15 strigoi but we didn't exactly kill them straight away, if you wanna know more I'll tell you later but right now I got to go save some stupid ass Moroi."

Lee nodded and Vika smiled, "We've got this end covered, go get them back Rose."

"Mummy, wait."

"What's wrong, Carla?" I said.

"Don't go, they're coming back. But we have to leave now, mummy, the wards are down."

I moved to the door and looked out the small window in time to see Christian put up a wall of flame between them and something, I didn't get a good look. I pulled the door open as they ran up the back steps and stumbled inside.

"We gotta go right now." Christian said.

"I know, everyone get in the car. Forget the stuff it can be replaced, people can't." I said as we moved to the front door. "Ok before we go out, Lee you and Becca in the back, with Jamie-" "What about a baby seat?" Lee asked.

"I'm gonna be blunt here Lee, do you think they're gonna give us enough time to put the car seat in? I don't think so, so you're just gonna have to hold him, ok?" Lee nodded. "Middle seat, Vika, Steph and Carla. Chris, you're in front with me, I'm driving ok?"

Everyone nodded.

Someone was tugging on my shirt, I looked down. "Mummy, I'm scared." Carla whispered, "I saw a scary mummy, and you have to promise me, be careful."

I knelt down and looked her in the eye, "What do you see baby?" I asked.

She pressed her lips together, "Be careful, mummy. Very careful. Promise me you'll be very careful mummy, I don't want to lose you."

"I promise baby, but if you need to can you use your magic to find me?"

"Of cause I can mummy, you don't have to ask."

I nodded, "Vika, can you carry Carla? Steph's a great runner but Carla's legs are too short to go far."

"Sure." she turned to Carla. "Come on sweetie, I'll get you there in one piece."

"We're going row by row, Chris can you cover Becca and Lee as they go, then Lee can you do the same when Vika brings the girls, that way Chris gets a break before we run."

"I'll try but I'm not as good as him."

"I'm only asking that you try your best, if you can't hold it call out so Vika knows to move faster." I moved slightly, "Alright lets go. Chris, there's only one window that has a clear view, it's upstairs."

"Gotcha, Rose. You need me, call." He said and bounced up the stairs.

I went to the door and stood behind Lee and Becca, who had Jamie in her arms. I glanced at Lee, _if Chris knew what I had planed should Lee's shield fall, he'd be furious but I have to do this._

"You ready Chris?" I called out.

"Whenever you are."

"Alright," I pulled open the door, "Light it up Chris." I called.

Flames erupted around the car and the easiest path to it. I shoved Lee out the door and Becca followed close behind him. I watched as they bolted for the car, both of them helping each other as they went, and they made it to the car without problem.

As they got in the car, I heard Christian call out, "Lee's taken it, do you want me to come down there?"

"Yeah, hurry Chris, we're going just as soon as you get here." I called back.

I gave Steph a push to head out. Vika scooped up Carla in her arms and reached out and grabbed Steph's hand, "Come on honey let's get you to your mum and dad, ok."

I watched as Vika moved out the door Carla looked back at me, tears in her eyes. _She knows_, I thought, _but it's too late now._

I watched as the flames gave out on one side and heard Lee call out, but I was already moving.

The first few steps were slow but once I caught my stride, I was fine. I heard Christian yelling at me but I was too far away to hear his words.

I watched as the flames completely went out and I doubled my pace, glad now for all those laps of the track Dimitri made me run.

The strigoi were moving forward and I slammed into the first one that got close enough to grab the girls and pushed my stake into his cold, dead heart I watched the light fade from his eyes before I moved on to the next one.

I was fighting with a few when I realised there was flames back up, I glanced up to see Christian moving forward with the girls; a ring of flames around them. Christian's eyes locked with mine in a silent question, I shook my head _no, don't come back, get them to safety first,_ I thought.

He seemed to hear what I was trying to say and nodded to me. I watched as he turned his back and moved away, the circle of flames going out just before touching me and reforming behind me, I sighed, _this is a good thing_, I thought.

I turned to the strigoi, "You want them, you'll have to go through me first!" I yelled.

I watched as one of them pointed at 2 others and flicked his fingers at me. They moved forward and started to circle me, I didn't move, waiting for them to make the first move.

I decided while I waited, I'd study what they looked like. One had blonde hair the other seemed to be black or at least dark brown, they both had red eyes, but that was as far as I got before they attacked me, Blondie went high, Stupid went low, I stepped back and kicked Stupid in the head causing him to bounce up into Blondie and they both crashed to the ground, I moved swiftly, kicking out and punching them both as I waited for my opening and caught Blondie in the chest with my stake, I knew from instinct I'd hit his heart, I moved on to finish off Stupid, but Boss man wasn't ready to let me kill another of his minions because he sent in more to kill me.

I shifted in my spot and took to the fight easily, killing several before I felt this sharp sting in my arm, I kept fighting, I pushed a strigoi off my stake and spun and caught another under her chin before pulling it out and hitting her in her heart with it.

I went to keep fighting when a wall of flames closed around me. I jerked back and looked around in time to see Vika grab my arm, right where I had a massive gash that was pumping out rivers of blood. I watched as something silver fell out and felt this pain blossom in my chest I groaned as Vika started to pull me to the car, all I could see was Christian standing on the roof and Becca's head peeking out the door.

I stumbled as we went but kept my feet, until we got to the stairs, I stumbled again and fell to my knees. I was seeing black dots and he pain in my chest was beginning to overwhelm me, there was more dark-spots then scenery in my vision.

I heard Vika say something then she swore. "She's out Chris!"

"Get her to the car. Now! Becca get in the front, you drive, Vika, you're in the back with Lee and Carla, Steph honey get in the front with your mum!" I could barely hear Christian and I watched as the flames went out then nothing.

_Christian POV:_

I watched as Viktoria ran to Rose, and I pushed myself harder. S_hould've gone back for her, you're so stupid. You say you love her you shouldn't have left her._

My energy was running low, but I wasn't going to give up until Rose was safe in my arms. _God if she survives I swear I'll tell her how I feel. Just let her be ok._

Vika made it to Rose and I closed the ring around them. I saw her start to pull Rose away, but something was wrong, _did Rose just stumble? _I watched closer, she seemed to be letting Vika lead her and she was clutching her shirt, right over her heart.

They got to the stairs, it was only another few steps and a couple of metres to the car when she went down, I saw her eyes flutter but stay open, but it was almost as if she wasn't all there any more, I cursed under my breath. "Rose." I whispered.

Vika turned to Rose, "Come on Roza, not far now." I heard her swear, "She's out Chris!"

"Get her to the car. Now! Becca get in the front, you drive, Vika, you're in the back with Lee and Carla, Steph honey get in the front with your mum!" I was trying to think like Rose, _don't fall apart yet, she's going to be fine. _I could feel them moving to their new spots beneath me as I spoke.

Vika picked up Rose and carried her to the car, she jumped straight in with rose in her arms, and I jumped off the roof and swung into the car. Viktoria had already climbed into the back.

"Let's get out of here now Becca." Lee said.

I ignored all their conversations and pulled Rose onto my lap, checking for a pulse, _come on, please be there_ I couldn't feel one. "Rose, come on honey, you can't give up, yet. I made you a promise you have to live for me to keep it, so you can see."

"What?" Vika jumped at me, "What's wrong?"

"Relax, please both of you. She's not gone yet. She's still fighting, I can see her aura, it's dim, but it's still there." Becca said. "Try and get some rest, Chris, you can drop the shield now, Vika see if you can calm down Carla."

I glanced at the little girl in the back seat, staring at her mother, her beautiful blue eyes popping out of her head and her mouth hanging open. I watched as Viktoria pulled her back and sat with her head on her chest, shushing the now crying 3 year old.

I turned back to the woman laying so still in my arms, I leaned down a placed a soft kiss on her lips and whispered, "Please wake up."

We arrived at the plane and got out, Vika scoping out the tarmac as we went, Rose was heavy in my arms, but I wouldn't let her go. I climbed the stairs after making sure that Carla was already on the plane and took Rose to the sleeping quarters.

"Becca, can you come with me?" I said on my way down. "I need you to do something for me."

"Sure," she said and got up to follow me.

Just before I walked into the room I saw Vika come up the stairs and push the button to shut the door, she looked grim.

I placed Rose down as gently as I could and pulled the blankets up over her still form. Becca moved to the other side of the bed and took a hold of Rose's hand, I felt a shift in the air then it was gone.

"I can't heal her, she's- well I don't know how she's doing it but she's blocking me, I can't even heal the cut on her arm." she looked up into my eyes and I saw it there in her face, she thought Rose was going to die.

"I didn't call you in here to heal her, I wanted to know if you could re-charm her ring to keep the ghosts out of her head." I sighed, "If she needs it I want it fixed so she doesn't have to deal with the pain that comes with being shadow-kissed as well as the pain she's bound to be in."

Becca lifted her head and looked closer at me, "You love her."

It was a statement, not a question but I answered her anyway, "Yeah, I do."

"She'll be fine, once she wakes up. But you need to keep a close eye on her while she's asleep." She replied, "I'll re-charm it, but only so if she's still bonded when she wakes up then she'll have it."

"What's that supposed to mean Becca?" I asked.

"What that means is, she wont let me heal her and her aura is fading," I saw that she had tears in her eyes, "It means that I- I don't know if she _will_ wake up."

I couldn't take my eyes off her. She leaned down and kissed Rose on her forehead and had to stifle a sob as she rushed from the room. I was dumbfounded, but I still managed to stumble to the bed and drop down beside the woman I loved, the woman who risked her life every day to protect people who didn't deserve her loyalty, let alone her life. The only person that did had barely seen her own mother since she was born because of the darkness Rose took from that bitch of an ex of mine.

I was on my knees beside the bed, holding Rose's hand when Vika walked in after we took off. I didn't bother lifting my head, let alone look at her, in time I would but right now I was still trying to deal with the fact that the woman I loved more than anything in my life, more than even Vasilisa or my parents before they turned, was going to die before I could tell her what she means to me, that I wasn't going to be able to tell her that if she dies, I might as well go with her because there's nothing left in this world for me if she's gone.

"Is she...?" Vika's voice cut through my thoughts.

"She's still here, but for how long not even Becca knows. Becca says that her aura is fading, which means that she could die at any time." I looked up into her face and she had tears running down her cheeks.

"I only just got to say that I was sorry for being mean to her, now you're saying she's gonna die?" she shuddered and pulled herself up, "No, she's not gonna die. You're lying, please say you're lying." she was sobbing by the end of her sentence.

"I'm not lying, but I can tell you this, if she dies than I will do everything I can until she wakes up, ok?" I looked at Rose, "You hear me, I'm not going to give up, ever."

Vika looked at me, "What do I tell Carla?" she whispered, "She hasn't said a word about Rose since she saw her in the car. I'm very worried about her, most children her age would be talking or crying or something, she's just sitting there staring into space with this weird look on her face."

"Send her in here and I'll tell her what's going on." I said, "It's better if she hears it from someone she's known and trusted her whole life."

Vika nodded and walked out and soon Carla walked in.

"Hey little one." I said, I climbed up onto the bed next to Rose, she already knew something was wrong. "Come over here, sweetie. I have something we need to talk about."

Carla walked over to me and I picked her up to sit next to both me and Rose. I looked on as she looked at her mother and placed her hand on her face.

"Carla, your mummy was hurt really badly and we don't know if she's going to get better." I said softly, "Do you still want to come with us, or do you want to stay with Becca? If mummy does wake up it might not be for a long time."

"I wanna stay with you and mummy." she said. "But now I need to go to sleep, it's way past my bed time, maybe I will dream of mummy."

"Well I hope you do, sweetie." I smiled at her lifted her up and set her down on the ground, I watched as she walked out of the room and into the one across the hallway and shut the door behind her.

I lay down beside Rose, and pushed her hair back from her face, "I'll be here, when you wake up, because you will, you're all I got left now. Remember? Just like I'm all you have too, well you've got Carla too so even if you just come back for her, just knowing that you're alive will be enough, even if you never love me like I love you then I'd still be happy, just knowing you're alive." I cupped her face softly, "That night we spent together is the best of my life, and I should have told you how I felt the moment I realised. Even last night holding you in my arms was such a sweet torture for me, especially when you moved into my chest. I honestly didn't know what to do then you smiled and slid your hand over my waist and snuggled into me. I thought I'd die happy in that moment, but thinking about it, I would be so much happier if both of us were able to grow old and die, then I'd be happy even if we weren't together. I know, I'm rambling, yeah me, mister _I'm so cool,_ but I- I guess I'm scared, scared of losing the one good thing in my life, sure Carla's a part of my life but only because she's your daughter, so then really, if I lose you, then I lose her too. So I would've lost the 2 best things to ever happen to me. I'm begging you Rose so you'd better wake up to hear this, please wake up, I need you more than I let on." I kissed her softly on her lips, "Please."

I started to fall asleep watching the rise and fall of her chest, but I didn't stay that way long.

Her breathing faltered as I watched and then stopped, then started again.

I leapt up off the bed and moved her so I could get to her heart, I wasn't a spirit user but I sure as hell wasn't going to let her die.

As I watched her breathe I started breathing the same as her, in, out

In, out

In, out

In, out

Slow, soft breath in, quick rush out

In, stop, out, shudder

….

In, out

….

In, stop a shudder, then out.

.

..

…

….

…. …. ….

I jumped into action, doing chest compressions and breathing manually for her.

"Come on Rose, you're a fighter. For the love of God don't stop now, keep fighting!"

Becca and Vika came running in and Becca burst into tears, Vika shoved her out of the way and took over Rose's breathing for me, I kept up doing the compressions.

"It's too late," Becca wailed, "Her aura's completely gone! Rose is dead!" I looked over at her to see she was standing there wringing her hands.

"If you're not here to help, then get out! I only want those who want Rose to live in here!" I yelled at her, "So make up your mind, now Becca!"

Becca bailed out of the room sobbing, I didn't care. If Rose died then I didn't want to see another sunrise.

_Lissa POV:_

I walked down the steps towards the Queen, ready to receive my Princess' tiara, getting the counsel to vote on my behalf had taken ages, and a lot of persuading, but now my voice would be heard, I'd be able to change that stupid law about damphir's graduating at 16.

It was going to be a great day, the moon was full, the stars were out and I had finally been accepted by the other Royals.

The then pain started, a dull ache shifted through my arm then nothing. It felt almost like I had been cut, but there wasn't any blood when I looked at it, I shrugged and kept walking.

I made it to the stairs when the pain in my arm increased, but it wasn't that that made me drop to the ground. It was the heart wrenching pain that exploded into my chest that had me screaming and clutching at the front of my dress.

I couldn't think through the pain, it was excruciating.

And then it was gone, everything was gone. Something felt so wrong, it was like someone had taken my heart; cut half of it off and put it back.

I realised then, as one word played through my head, that she was gone. As the darkness rose up in my mind that one word that had became my anchor and i had pushed her away, for nothing.

_**Rose.**_


	8. so sorry guys and girls

Sorry for the delay in updating again i am NOT doing this to keep you in suspence, it is that the USB drive i was using to store my stories on has crashed and the only way to fix it is to format it, unfortunatly it has all my stories on it.

but fortunatly i will not be abandoning my story, i just have to rewrite it, so it may be a while before i update.

I AM SOO SORRY GUYS AND GIRLS!

xoxo


	9. The Shadow Lands and a Daughter's Love

**Chapter 7: The Shadow Lands and a Daughter's Love**

_Carla POV:_

I walked into the room across from mum's, laid down on the bed and waited. Waited for mum's soul to leave her body, waited for her to die.

Looking at the ceiling, I thought back to mum's question.

_**Flashback**_

_I reached up and tugged on mum's shirt, "Mummy, I'm scared." and I had every right to be, I had had a dream where she had died and I hadn't been able to save her because she died before we got somewhere safe. "I saw a scary mummy, and you have to promise me you'll be careful."_

_She knelt down and looked deep into my eyes, I always thought that she could see into my soul, "What did you see baby?" she asked me, knowing that I had had a dream._

_I was about to tell her when I felt like I shouldn't, like my magic told me not to. I pressed my lips together, "Be careful, mummy. Very careful. Promise me you'll be very careful mummy, I don't want to lose you."_

_Her eyes lit up with knowledge,_ she knew_ I thought, "I promise baby, but if you need to, can you use your magic to find me?"_

_She definitely knew, "Of cause I can mummy, you don't have to ask." she was going to die, but I had to bring her back, I wouldn't let her stay dead, or bonded to that bitch Lissa._

_Mummy started making plans and I heard her say that I was to be carried by her friend Vika. Vika looked at me and said, "Come on sweetie, I'll get you there in one piece."_

_I looked up at her and hoped mummy would be ok. Mum was still making plans and was saying how we were going to be sitting and how we were to get there. I watched as my Chrissie ran upstairs to use his magic._

"_You ready, Chris?" mummy called out._

"_Whenever you are." he replied._

"_Alright," she opened the door and called back, "Light it up!"_

_I saw flames spring up outside and mummy pushed Uncle Lee to get him moving, and Auntie Becca chased after him, helping each other when they needed it. They got to the car safe and I watched Lee fix his magic and take over for my Chrissie so he could come downstairs._

_Vika scooped me up and turned out to the door, grabbing Stephie's hand "Come on honey, let's get you to your mum."_

_I glanced back over Vika's shoulder and into mum's eyes, _I'll find you, mummy._ I thought, _I'll bring you back.

I pulled the blankets up to my chin, it was cold on the plane and I knew I had a while to wait before everything started happening. I needed to stay calm, this is the first time I was going to bring someone back.

The problem with that is someone on this side needed to not give up on her and to keep a hold of her soul, or if I brought her back after they had given up, she would become a forever ghost, trapped in the land of the living, unable to communicate or to move on and never able to see those she loved ever again. I had to make sure I got her back before then, I didn't want to be the reason she was stuck.

Feeling the shift in the air, I quickly pushed the blankets down to the bottom of the bed and opened myself to my magic. Pulling it in and pushing it out with my soul attached, I scouted for the rip mum had made in her passing and placed a dark band in place so it wouldn't close on us.

I pushed through and into the open space of the abyss and on into the shadow lands, pulling more of my magic to me so I wouldn't run out before I found mum.

Flowing over the land I looked for her aura, my eyes seeking out anyone who had a dark shadow in their aura, I only had 3 hours here before it had been a minute in the living world, but this wasn't my first trip here, I had come here when I was a little younger than I am now and spent a whole night in the land of the living here in the shadow lands. In shadow land time I had been here for 90 days the first time, a total of 12 hours in the living world, but then I had been training with, as they had called themselves, the Death Dealers that had already passed away. We were the only ones who could send someone to the shadow lands with one touch, or bring someone back from the dead without becoming bonded to them, we could also travel through the shadow lands to other times and places, using it as a go between to see into the past, or in my case when I dream, the future.

Following my instinct I dropped into the Dealer's Den, and bowed to Rajah, the head of our order. "Wise Man, I seek my mother, dead before her time. Would you gift me with a direction to her soul or must I continue without aid?" I asked.

Rajah stirred in his seat and looked down at me, "I may aid you. She is in the grove of the white tree and is set on finding one she calls 'Mason Ashford,' perhaps this boy may aid you in her returning with you."

"Thank you, Wise Man." I said as I bowed again. "I am forever grateful to you."

He nodded and I took off, heading to the white ash tree that grew in the Kress Planes hoping that she was there, but in the mean time I had to call to the dead and have them tell me where I could find Mason.

I landed just away from the grove and in the midst of a sea of people, their hands reaching for me I pushed them back with a thought. "Where is the one named Mason Ashford, the one tied to my mother?"

My voice carried over the heads of the crowd and a young man stepped forward, "My name's Mason Ashford, but I never knew someone who had a daughter."

Looking at him I recognised him from a few photo's mum had shown me, "You knew Rose Hathaway?" I asked him.

His eyes went wide and he took a step forward. "Please don't tell me she's dead, I did what I did to save her, is she oh God." He was begging me to tell him he was wrong, but I couldn't lie here, it was ingrained in me to always tell the truth to the dead.

"She is, but that's why I am here, I'm here to take her back because her love hasn't given up and the world still needs her." I glanced into his eyes and sighed, "I need you to help me, I need you to tell her that she has to come back to the world of the living, come back to me."

"Her love?" he asked, "Is she with Dimitri now?"

"No, he used her and told her his love had faded because he had been getting closer to her then he was compelled by Natasha Ozera, when in fact his love had never existed as more than the love for a younger sister." I sighed, "Mum is only just getting over it and is being helped by her true love."

"Then I will help you, on one condition." he said.

"What?" I asked, very wary of what he would want in return.

"Tell me about what's been going on in the land of the living." he stated.

"I can tell you what I know, but you cannot tell mum, is that clear?"

"Yes. That is fine with me."

"Then walk with me to her and I shall tell you as we go."

We began walking, it would take us an hour to get there, shadow land time and I would have enough time for him to talk to her before I brought her back.

"After your death, mum was heart broken, she may not have loved you as much as you loved her but given time, and stop Dimitri from coming into her life and you and her would've ended up together, for awhile." I took a breath, "my mum's true love is someone she's known for quite some time but it's not my place to say his name. After the attack on the school, mum went to Russia to try and free Dimitri's soul but ended up getting caught by him and held his prisoner, she managed to escape from him by staking him on the bridge near Novabrisk, she didn't quite hit his heart so he lived but she went back to school and graduated top of her class. She moved to court after reconciling with Lissa, after she cracked the shits for mum leaving to save Dimitri and that it was mum's fault that her and Christian broke up, and things took a turn and they got the information they needed to restore strigoi back to their original state. That was when Lissa got kidnapped by Dimitri and she staked him, changing him back."

"Wow, that's a lot." he said, looking ahead of where we were. "Anything else?"

"Yeah, mum tried to talk to him and he turned her away and after a while Lissa got upset that she was trying to talk to him and had a go at her so she went to see him in the church and he told her 'Love fades, mine has.' So she tried to move on but it wasn't working, she avoided him and her and after a while she ran into Christian and he made her a deal that he would get her out of there if she'd be his guardian. She said yes, he did the paperwork and they travelled for a while and they've only just come and got me. So is that all you wanted to know or is there something else?"

"Just one, who's your dad?"

"That's one I'd like to know too." I replied.

Opening my magic I felt her aura coming closer, we were only a minute away from seeing her, I stopped and waited Mason turned to me and looked into my eyes, he nodded and walked into the clearing where she waited.

I watched as they met in the middle of the clearing, right under the ash tree and I watched as she hugged him, tears streaming down her face and soon he moved back and I knew he was telling her about everything, about how he didn't blame her and how he wished he could've stayed but how he knew it was his time to go and finally he told her about me coming to get her.

She glanced over at where I stood and I walked down to her, "It's time mum, we need to leave." I said softly, "Christian needs you, and so do I."

"I know," she said. "Are you sure, Mase?"

"Yeah, don't worry, somehow I know that I'll see you again, before you come here again." he said, "I'll always love ya, Rosie."

She nodded and hugged him again, "Love you too, Mase." she turned to me, "Let's go home, just show me the way."

Nodding I lifted my hand and shot a light to the gate I had put in place for us to leave through, "Just follow the light, mum, and we'll be home soon enough." I said and she gave one last wave to Mason as she took off down the path at a run.

I followed close behind her after saying my good-bye to Mase and she stopped suddenly, looking at me, "I can't run as fast as I want to because I don't want to lose you here."

"Just run mum, I'll keep up. I always do."

She nodded and started to run, her strides getting longer and longer until she was running faster than a strigoi would in the other world. I took to the air, using my gifts and watched over her from above until she was almost at the gate.

Descending from the sky, I landed lightly beside the gate and watched as mum ran up to me and stopped at my side. "This is as far as I can help you, the rest is up to you. I am going to open the gate and you have to walk through and find your way through the darkness and once you've done that you'll sink into your body again." I glanced away, "If Christian hasn't given up yet, if he has then if you go through, you will never be able to come back here, never be able to talk to anyone you ever knew. I'm sorry, but I have to tell you."

She looked at me, "I understand and I'm willing to take the chance."

"Are you ready?" I asked.

"Yes." she replied.

Pushing my magic at the gate, I made it open and she stepped through, I watched as she disappeared into the darkness. _Good luck, mother dearest._

I walked into the gate and pushed through to the other side, my soul falling into my body and I shuddered as my surroundings seemed to still be moving. As they settled down I rolled onto my side, waiting again to see if he would give up or would she make it. My heart in my throat as I waited to hear, I couldn't lose her now, I had done all I could do to try and save her. It was all up to her now, she would have to find her way back to us on her own.

Straining my ears, I could hear Christian still begging her to come back and to see him, and to not leave 'us' alone when 'we' still needed her, I could also hear Vika as she prayed, begging God for my mother's soul back.

I felt her come through and waited, my heart sped up as I felt her soul slide into her body, _she's back,_ I thought.

**Just a note to say, thank you to everyone who has reviewed, it's nice to know that my stories are appreciated. And yes I am Australian, not American.**


	10. The Truth Prevails

**Chapter 8: The Truth Prevails**

_Rose POV:_

It was dark, but I thought that was just because I couldn't lift my eyelids, on the other hand I could hear everything that was said around me. The soft breaths that moved through their mouths, the gentle touch on my face and then I could breathe again.

Jerking slightly I drew a breath into my body, my eyes fluttered and I saw Christian's and Vika's surprised faces for a moment before they shut again and I fell back, falling into a deep sleep.

The next time I awoke, I let myself study my surroundings before showing that I was awake. First I concentrated on my hearing, I could hear one person taking soft, slow breaths and softly snoring, _so they're asleep._

Next was touch, I could feel the softness of the sheets beneath me, the gentle weight of the sheet over me, the cool breeze that floated over my face from the air conditioning. But what gained my attention the most was the hand grasping mine in a soft yet firm grip, almost as if they didn't want to let go of me even while they were asleep.

Taking a breath through my nose, I utilised my sense of smell coming across a wonderfully, delicious totally male scent, that sent my blood racing and my body to heat slightly, I couldn't wait any more.

Opening my eyes I turned my head to see Christian slumped over in his chair, his head resting on the side of my bed, his hand locked around mine. I couldn't help but smile at him, he looked so innocent in his sleep, I caught myself smiling as I imagined his cheeky grin, the one that leads to mischief and laughter.

I had to tell him, there was no stopping it now, I had fallen in love with my ex-best friend's ex-boyfriend, my only friend AND my charge on top of that. But I had no choice, I couldn't keep hiding the truth from him and I knew that I had to tell Carla who her dad was, I couldn't keep it to myself any more. If this had taught me any thing is that I can't keep my secrets from everyone, or no one will know anything if I had died today, or yesterday, when ever it was.

Sitting up, I reached my hand out and began to stroke his hair, it was soft and silky under my fingers, even though he had to have been by my side since the fight, I couldn't stop looking at his eyes as he began to stir, I felt the moment he woke up and then watched as he opened his astonishing blue eyes, and looked up at me.

He seemed stunned that I was awake and I gave him a soft smile, "You got a bit of drool just there." I said softly.

He wiped the back of his hand across his mouth, "That doesn't matter. What matters is that you knew this was going to happen and you didn't tell me." he never raised his voice, it was just the same, concerned but resigned, "We were all so worried about you, Carla started crying when Vika got you into the car, so much so that she didn't stop until we got on the plane."

"It wasn't my choice, I was told by Yeva, that if they got their hands on her I would never see her again, I couldn't risk it, Chris. She's my life, my everything, if she was gone, I don't know what I'd do, I can't lose her, ever." I took a breath, being careful not to open my mouth too far, I had felt something in my mouth that I knew he hadn't seen yet, I knew what they were the same as I knew my dad was going to freak out at me when we landed, "She's my baby."

Christian's eyes softened, "I know, Rose. I just wish you had have told me, I could've helped you protect her, I would've done anything I could to protect her and you, you both are everything to me. I don't ever want to think that I'd lost you again, Rose. I mean, you did technically die but you came back to life but I was still scared. I just, it was, I was really scared that I'd lost you for good this time." he seemed like he was hiding something that he wished I knew, and it was frustrating him that I didn't.

My eyes locked with his, "Why are you saying these things, Chris?" I asked.

He spun away from me and paced the length of the room before coming back to me, standing right in front of me he grabbed my face with his hands and looked into my eyes, as if trying to see what I would do. His lips crushed mine and I was lost in the heat of his skin, his soft hands holding my face to his and I couldn't take it any more, I grabbed his shirt and pulled him onto me on the bed.

He gasped as we broke apart for air and looked back into my eyes. I didn't know what he saw in my eyes, but I could see his eyes shinning, like there was a flame behind them, dancing with joy at my reaction.

"For God's sake, Rose. I love you." he finally said.

"I love you too." I whispered softly, my hands moving around his neck to pull him back down so I could hold him against me, I just wanted to be held by him, nothing more just yet, but soon I would have him, as soon as we were back at the Belikovs' house.

He moved so he was laying beside me and pulled me onto his chest, his heartbeat right underneath my ear and my leg sitting over his. "I missed being able to hold you like this, after I left, I realised it was the most stupidest thing I had ever done in my life and I should never have even thought about it, let alone done it."

"That's the past, let's leave it there." I said snuggling closer to him. "I just wanna focus on the now, and where the future will take us."

"I have one question about the past," he said. "You don't have to answer it."

I froze, I knew exactly what he was going to ask and I wanted to tell him so badly that it hurt but I wasn't sure how he'd take it. "What is it?" I finally asked.

"Is Dimitri Carla's dad?" he asked and I could hear the pain in his voice, it travelled through his body, "Or is Adrian? Whoever it is had better step up and help you."

My breath caught in my throat, "Neither." I whispered. "Her dad is a great man and I would willingly give my life to protect his because it was either me or him, if only so he could watch over her as she grew."

He moved and I climbed off his chest, he turned so I couldn't see his face and had his back to me, sitting on the side of the bed. "Who?" it was a broken plea for me to stop his pain and tell him the truth, tell him that it didn't matter about who her real dad was, but that I wanted him to be her dad.

"You are her dad, Chris." I said softly, putting my hand on his back.

It was his turn to freeze, but he still spun around to face me, "Did you just say that I'm her dad? Like no one else is? Just me?"

I nodded slowly, "Yeah, I did and she is only yours. She has your eyes and unruly hair. She even has your sense of mischief."

"Carla's my daughter?" his was shocked and surprised at the same time. "I have a daughter?"

"Why do you think I made you spend so much time with her, I wanted you both to love each other so that way if something did happen to me and I hadn't told you, then you and her would get along even after I was gone." I said, my voice filling with the emotions that I couldn't express out loud. "It's in my will that she is to be placed in your care if I'm unable to look after her or I pass away."

He cupped my face in his hands, he was still shocked, but I could see it wearing off and I was wary of him becoming angry at me, "I'm Carla's dad." he whispered and then grinned, "I'm her dad, I have a daughter! I can't... this is incredible... I'm a dad, I have a daughter with the woman I love and I didn't even know."

I smiled softly, "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you before, I didn't want you to hate me for not telling you and I didn't want her to feel like I did, growing up thinking that her dad didn't care about her because he didn't want to spend time with her."

"I would never get angry at you, I would've been over the moon, I wanted kids for a while now, but only with you, I wanted to see you glowing from being pregnant with our child. I wanted to see our child growing inside you." his smile was soft and wistful, yet sad as well. "I wasn't there for Carla, so I didn't get to see."

I looked at his warm, ice blue eyes, "Maybe, we can have another baby, once we get settled down into our own home?"

His eyes lit up like fireworks on New Years Eve, "Really? You want to have another baby? With me, like I'd be there the whole time?"

"Yes, yes and I wouldn't have one with anyone else. I'm not someone who sleeps around, and while I hadn't thought about being in a proper relationship with you, I wasn't with anyone else after Dimitri or after we were together, oh wait I had that one time alone with Adrian and he tried to press the issue, so I sent him on his way."

"He did what? And you didn't tell me before?" he was upset to say the least.

"This is why I didn't tell you, I knew you'd go off the deep end at him if you saw him, I just wanted to keep the peace." I sighed and turned away from him.

"I'm sorry but after what you told me about he did with Lissa I wanted to hit him, this just makes me want to bash him more. I can't believe you didn't tell me." his was pacing across the room, his anger filling the room, "How far did he get before you sent him away?"

My anger sparked, _how dare he assume that I would let him do anything to me!_ I was so close to jumping across the room and hitting him when it happened. Colour exploded in my sight and I looked at Chris, dancing around him were so many colours it was hard to tell what they all were but the most dominant were the colours green, blue and red.

"Chris?" I whispered trying to hide the quiver in my voice, but even I could hear the fear in it and the trembling of my hands.

He turned to me and I saw that the red and green faded, but in their place a soft yellow swirled quickly through the air, "What is it, Rose?" he asked and I could feel his worry throughout the room.

"I can see colours floating around you, they keep changing with your mood, what's wrong with me?" I wanted to burst into tears and throw a tantrum, but I didn't do it, something about this felt so familiar, but at the same time I knew I wasn't me who normally had this thing.

"Explain it to me, Rose and I'll try and help you." he said, coming over to the bed and sitting back down beside me, "Tell me how you know it's connected to my moods, and what colours there are."

"Ok so, you were angry and there was red and you were jealous and there was a lot of green around you, but there was blue around you, and there still is. But now the red and green are gone and there's this pale yellow colour and I know from the look on your face that you're worried about me." I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, "I feel like I know what's happening, but I can't remember were I've seen it before. Tell me, Chris, why are you sad?"

"Sad? I'm sad because I feel like by bringing you away from court, I've taken you away from all your friends and that you wont want to go back, unless I do." He cupped my face, "I wasn't angry at you, I was angry at Adrian for doing what he did to you, as for jealous, I wish that I could've been the person you turned to after Dimitri, but on the other hand I'm glad that I wasn't your rebound guy. 'Cause then you wouldn't love me like you do now."

"So I can see your emotions? How does that...?" my own words came back to mind;

"_So, Adrian, how does this whole aura thing work?" I asked._

"_I see swirling colours around people, different colours are different emotions. Some colours have several different meanings, such as yellow, light yellow colours can mean fear, normal yellow can mean courage and dark yellow; happiness. Light purple means deceit. It all depends on the face or situation that the person shows or finds themselves in." he replied, "Does that answer your question?"_

"_Yeah, but what about the other colours?"_

"_Try and guess. We'll start with, blue."_

"_Sadness?"_

"_Yes, but it could also be depression, try green."_

"_Jealousy, envy?"_

"_Yep to both, but also a light or pale green means something different again. What about red?"_

"_Anger, passion. A deep love?"_

"_See? You know what your going on about, you don't need me to write out a list, just go with your instincts and you'll find out what ever you want to know. But if someone ever shows the colour magenta then avoid them if they are looking at you, because they mean you harm." he grinned at me, "Have fun looking through Lissa's eyes."_

I collapsed back onto the bed, "I'm a spirit user." I whispered.

Christian's eyes widened, "How?" he asked.

"The colours, its your aura. How stupid of me, I've been bonded to Lissa so long that I haven't been thinking for myself. She's a spirit user and still I didn't see the signs, my anger when you were angry was blown completely out of proportion and then I wanted to burst into tears before." I sighed, "This is going to be very tricky."

He lay on the bed next to me and took a hold of my hand, his lips moved over my knuckles and he pressed small kisses across my hand and wrist. I felt his determination to make me feel better and tried not to sigh out loud.

"Are you ok, Rose? You seem a little distant now." he asked I could still see the worry reflected in his aura, "Do you want me to leave you alone?"

"No, Chris, don't leave. I just need a bit of time to take this in, I have to stop the colours from dancing in my vision and I feel so damn tired." I said, something in me was changing and I couldn't think properly, it was almost like I was hungry but thirsty at the same time, like a dry burn in the back of my throat. "And now it feels like I'm hungry but thirsty and there's this feeling in the back of my throat and I just can't concentrate."

"I think that I might know what's going on, have you felt different since you woke up? Or is it just now?"

"I've been feeling different since I woke up but this has only just started, but then I think I know what has been happening to me, and why I can use my magic now, my dad said it when he called ages ago, how there was this device under my skin that stopped my magic, but if I die after it fell out then I would need to drink blood like a normal moroi."

"So you need to feed then, that burning hunger/thirst feeling is the same feeling I get when I haven't fed for a while, so I'd say that you do." he glanced at me, "So, who can you feed off on the plane?"

I looked into his ice blue eyes and realised he was being serious, "No one Chris, I didn't even think that this would happen, I mean while we were in Russia I was gonna talk to Sonja about trying to find out where the device was, but that was it, once I found it I was going to have it removed. But until then, just knowing where it was was good enough for me."

"So, no one?" he asked.

"Yeah, no one. Didn't Becca and Lee have a feeder?"

"Not at their house, they used to visit someone outside of town and do it there." he sighed, "You're gonna get really cranky aren't you?"

"I don't know, but I feel really weak. How long until we land?" I asked. "If it's not too long I should be fine and not try to rip anyone's throats out."

He chuckled, "I don't think it would come to that. I mean I've seen you go days without a doughnut and still been fine, so just think of it as training not to eat heaps."

"So you're saying that I eat heaps?" I asked, my eyebrows raised in surprise, "Is that your subtle way of telling me I'm fat?"

He spluttered for a moment before regaining his composure, "No, what I'm saying is that as a moroi you wont be able to fit as much food in your tummy as you used to."

"So now you're saying I eat a lot?"_ This is fun, playing with him._

"No, but you, I just argh!" he was flabbergasted, "What do you want me to say?"

Bursting out laughing and putting my hand over my mouth, I couldn't help but shake my head at the shock on his face. I was laughing so hard, but I still kept my mouth covered or closed slightly.

He shook his head, "Really Rose?" he asked.

Between fits of giggles I asked, "What did you think, that everything was gonna turn into the prefect, love only relationship? Nope I love bickering with you and messing around too."

He grinned at me, "Good, 'cause I love tormenting you too. It's a lot of fun."

I burst out laughing again as I shoved him off the edge of the bed and his face showed shock and mischief, but I forgot about his talent and soon I was surrounded by flames as he laughed.

Giggling, I leaned through the flames, "I know they're fake, I can't feel any heat off them." I giggled again, "Come kiss me, you hothead."

He ginned and jumped up off the floor, making the flames disappear and sat on the edge of the bed for a moment before he remembered that it was a bad place to sit near me, so he pushed me down on the bed and moved so he was hovering over me, his toned chest pressed against mine.

Distantly, I realised, I was pinned by his long fingers wrapped around my wrists and his body on mine. I glanced up through my eyelashes and looked into his eyes, to see them smouldering with barely contained heat. "So are you gonna kiss me or am I waiting for nothing?" I whispered softly.

The heat in his eyes got darker, "I'm gonna kiss you and you're gonna forget everything, including your own name." his voice was a caress of the darkest kind of lust and my body responded, all my muscles contracted and I wanted to drown in his voice, his eyes, hell, I just wanted to down in him.

"Well, I'm still waiting." I whispered back.

He pressed his lips to mine softly and the heat exploded again. I had to force myself not to rush this, though all I wanted was to feel his skin again, like I had only once before, our bodies locked together in a passionate embrace.

His tongue flicked across my lips and I gave him entrance, not remembering that I was hiding something in my mouth. But I hadn't needed to worry because soon enough he broke from the kiss and was making his way down my neck, finding the soft sensitive spot in the side of my neck.

He lifted his head and I found that he had slipped between my legs. Feeling his erection on my core, I gasped, my entire mouth open and flashed my fangs at him.

He froze for a moment before leaning back down and kissing me again, his tongue exploring my mouth and stroking my fangs.

My body was trembling and on fire, and I found myself slipping, where to I didn't know, but it was amazing, the colours were so bright and I could see that they were full of love and passion and happiness and I sighed.

Looking up into Christian's face I saw that he was astonished by what had happened and was glad that he'd been able to see it too. "What was that?" he asked, his voice filled with awe and surprise.

"I don't know but I know that it was my magic that showed us, though I don't know if you were meant to see that or if it was a different part of my magic." I smiled, "It sure was beautiful though. I could've stared at it for ever."

"Yeah, it was beautiful. Do you think it was our emotions? Like you could see them because they were so strong they were every where and then you showed me so I could see how we were together?" he was full of questions, "Do you think it will happen every time we kiss or do 'stuff' together."

Thinking about it I said, "Yeah it looked almost exactly like your emotions from before but there were a few others, like I could see a bright white and a soft green. The white meaning contentment and the green, I don't know. I'd have to ask a spirit user. But around it all was a red-gold colour that looked as though the 2 didn't really go together, they just were together, for us." I sighed, "I just wish I knew for sure."

"Well, we'll just have to talk to Becca, and not the bitch and the cheater." he laughed, "I wish I could see the looks on their faces when they find out you're a spirit user."

Laughing with him I was struck by the sudden feeling of being alone, "Do you feel that or is it just me?"

"Feel what?" he looked into my eyes, but I was gone into my own head, searching for something but I didn't find it.

"You said I died, didn't you?" I whispered.

"Yeah, we were doing CPR for a while before you came back." he replied, "Why, what's wrong?"

"Lissa." I whispered. "The bond's gone. I can't feel her any more and I know that she thinks I'm dead."

"Yeah. But is that a good thing, or a bad thing?" he asked.

"I don't know, it might be good, it might be bad. She might tell the Queen that I'm dead and then they may think that you're dead also." I sighed, "So many things could happen because I died then came back, again."

"So what does that mean for us? Do we have to go back?"

"Nope, so long as my dad knows we're alive then it doesn't matter to me that no one else does, but you may want to tell your aunt so we avoid the accusations when she does find out that we are." I grinned at him, "We could use this to our advantage, and just drop off the planet so long as the important people know that we're still here."

He laughed and said, "I love the way your mind works."

We both laughed until the door opened and I remembered that I was underneath Christian and I couldn't see who it was in the doorway.

"I see you woke up again, Roza." Vika's voice came from the other side of Christian and he rolled to one side, revealing her to me.

"Yeah, I woke up."

"So does this mean that you and Chris have finally told each other about your love?"

Blushing I said, "Um. Well, yeah we did. How did you know?"

She laughed, "How could I not! It was written all over your face in the car and then when you were, shall we just say, having an out of body experience, or OBE as it  
shall now be known as, Christian was kinda very vocal about how if you died he didn't want to live and blah blah blah. So I just put that together and it made love."

I could feel that my eyes were wide as dinner plates and I couldn't stop the blush that had taken over my whole face, "Vika, пожалуйста, ничего не говорите об этом."

"What was that?" Christian asked. "I don't speak other languages very well."

Vika gave him her most evil smirk, then turned back to me "Я заметил, что вы не хотите, чтобы я сказал много вещей, так что же мне делать?"

"Ну, если вы считаете меня семья, вы не будете ничего говорить. И я позволю вам переехать к нам, в качестве второго опекуна, только если будет хорошо и ваша мама говорит, хорошо ".

I replied. "Так что вы хотите получить эту работу, или я дам ему кто-то старше, как, Denis?"

She squealed, "Me! I want it!" and all I could do was laugh at her.

"Any way, we're about to land." she said. _Oh shit._ Was all I could think of.

Translations:

"_**Vika, please don't say anything about that."**_ =

"Vika, пожалуйста, ничего не говорите об этом."

"_**I noticed that you don't want me to say a lot of things, so what am I to do?"**_ =

"Я заметил, что вы не хотите, чтобы я сказал много вещей, так что же мне делать?"

"_**Well if you consider me family you wont say anything. And I will let you move in with us, as second Guardian only if you be good and your mum says ok."**_ =

"Ну, если вы считаете меня семья, вы не будете ничего говорить. И я позволю вам переехать к нам, в качестве второго опекуна, только если будет хорошо и ваша мама говорит, хорошо ".

"_**So do you want the job, or am I gonna give it to someone older like, Denis?"**_ =

"Так что вы хотите получить эту работу, или я дам ему кто-то старше, как, Denis?"

**THAT'S RIGHT GUYS AND GALS, I'M BACK!**

**xoxo Kye**


	11. Daddy Dearest

**Chapter 9: Daddy Dearest.**

**Before I go into the chapter I would like to say to my 'Guest' reviewer, if you continue to read this, that I am sorry for not stating as such about Rose and Christian being together, this is my first fanfic and I'm not entirely sure of all the intricate details that are necessary to that, I am not taking it as an insult, but I will learn from it, thanks.**

**-Kye**

It took barely 20 minutes for the plane to land and another 15 before we were aloud to disembark, and in that whole time I couldn't stop fidgeting, thinking about the last time I spoke to Abe and the very rude way that I had hung up on him and not answered any of his other calls.

Carla stroked her hand down the side of my face and I could almost hear her saying 'Don't worry mum, me and Chris are here for you.' She was sitting on my lap and I had to give it to her, when I needed her the most she had been there for me and still managed not to become bonded to me, though I wouldn't have minded being bonded to her as I knew I could look after her better then.

Glancing to my left, Christian grinned at me, "Are we scared of seeing our daddy, Rosie? Or is it just too much pressure for the bad ass guardian to take?"

I glared at him, "Not scared of seeing my dad, I'm slightly nervous of him accepting Carla as his granddaughter and my child. I don't want him to be a prick to her like he was to me. So first sign of him being mean..."

"We're out of here, even if it means we have to hitch hike." he finished for me.

Something in the corner of my eye caught my attention and I turned to look at Becca as she smiled at us and then glanced at her husband. "Becca, what are you smiling about?"

She turned back to me and her grin got wider, "Just something me and Lee were talking about a few weeks ago now. And I'm glad we were right."

"Want to expand that explanation?" Chris asked.

"So we were talking about when you two were finally going to get together, and we both said before Christmas, so I guess that's it, huh, Lee?" she replied.

"Yeah, something like that." he said.

I flicked my magic out and looked at their auras, "Lie." I said, "That's not the whole truth, what else is it?"

Becca froze, "How did you...? But you can't be. That's impossible." she was looking around at my aura, and then her eyes focused on my face, "How?" was all she said.

"Long story, answer my question and I'll answer yours."

"We were wondering when you were going to tell him about Carla's dad, and from the look on his face right now, I'd say he knows. So are you going to tell the rest of us or are we staying in the dark?" she asked.

"Yes, he knows about Carla's dad. But until I speak to Carla about this herself, I'm not saying another thing about it." I said and looked into Carla's eyes. "We're going to talk when we get to Aunty Vika's house, is that ok, princess?"

"Yep, that's fine mummy. I love you so much and I'm glad you're ok." she smiled up at me, "I'm hungry, mummy."

"Awe, baby I love you too. I'll get you something as soon as we get off the plane, ok honey?" I asked, "Think about what you want, ok?"

"Ok, mummy."

We were all talking amongst ourselves when the door opened and we all began moving from our seats and towards them when there was a call of "Rosemarie Hathaway, get out here now please!"

I sighed, it was gonna be a long night. I made my way towards the door when Vika blocked my path, and made me sit down with Carla, pushing her into my arms.

"What kind of guardian would I be if I let you go out there without checking the area first, gosh Roza, I'm not dumb." she said with a roll of her eyes, and walked out the door and down the stairs.

"Never said you were!" I called after her and stood up, _like hell I'm waiting when he's already angry._ I moved down the aisle and out the door, with Carla still wrapped in my arms and began my own survey of the airport before walking down the steps, looking straight at Abe as I did.

"About time, Kiz." he said.

"Well I'm sorry that you feel like I purposely took my time in getting back. It's not like I died or anything important happened." I said my words dripping with sarcasm.

"But mummy, Auntie Vika was talking to Becca and she said you did die. But they brought you back and now you were different." she smiled at me, happy about her ability to recall an adult's conversation. "I was scared when they brought you in and you was bleeding mummy, but you're ok now?"

"Yeah, honey, I'm fine. Chris and Aunty Vika saved mummy with your help 'cause you found me." I replied, remembering my time in the shadow lands. "So Baba, what would to like to talk about?" I smiled at him, flashing my fangs.

"What happened while you were gone, Rose?" he asked. "How long have you been, um, your true self?"

"Well, I'll tell you on a few conditions." I replied.

"Name it." he said, glancing between me and Carla.

"One, you buy all of us dinner as none of us have had anything substantial to eat in ages. Two, you listen to the whole story before you say anything. And three, you pay for four tickets to court for Christian's cousin, her husband and their two kids." I said.

"Does this story include how you became a mother?" he asked.

"If you wish to know, I will tell you." I replied.

"Then consider it all done." he replied. "Do you have a car, or must I transport you?"

"We have a car, but there's not enough space for us all. If you would, myself, Christian and my daughter will travel in yours and Vika can drive my car with Becca, Lee and the two kids, to which ever place you wish to feed us at." I thought for a moment, "And I do mean both kinds of feeding, father."

"Of cause, that will be fine." he looked at Carla, "You look just like your mother id when she was your age, but you have different coloured eyes than she did."

Carla looked at him with her big, ice blue eyes and smiled, "You look like my mummy too, so who does that make you?"

"He's my daddy honey, your grandfather." I cut in with, "Remember the photo I showed you of mummy's graduation? With Mia, Eddie, Lissa, Christian and those two, as you called them, oldies? Remember how I said one was your grandparent?"

"I remember now mummy, you said, 'One's your grandparent but the other is a fraud.' Is that right?" she asked and I laughed.

"Yeah, that's right honey. But even if Janine is a fraud, she still loved me, in her own way." I sighed, "Come on old man, lets get some food."

"Yes, the sooner you're fed, the sooner you'll talk." he chuckled.

I turned and called the all clear and watched as Chris rushed down the stairs and straight over to where I was standing, closely followed by Becca and Lee walking out with their kids.

"So what's going on?" Chris asked me, then grinned at Carla. "Are you still hungry, my precious? Or are you tired again?"

She looked up at him from under her eyelashes, "I'm hungry and tired, silly Chrissy. I little so I need both lots."

Laughing, I pushed him, "She's just like a mini me, always hungry and loves to sleep." I frowned at the look dad was giving Chris, "What's wrong, old man?"

"You seem to be very close to your charge is all, Kiz." he replied and made a sign with his hand and the doors to his car opened, "Lets go get all of you fed."

I turned to Vika, "You know where my car is, can you follow us in it with Becca, Lee and the kids?"

"Yeah, were are we going?" she asked, "Mum's probably going nuts waiting for us to come home."

"Well, why don't we grab some maccas and drive straight there, you and I can talk as we go and the little ones can eat then go to sleep." Abe said, "And for those of you who wish, I have a home that you may stay in for a while until you wish to go to court."

Becca glanced at Lee then me, her eyes finally resting on Abe "We would be most appreciative of your offer, though we wont stay long, we will need to tell the Queen of the attack on our house before things get out of proportion." she sighed. "Every thing we had was in that house and now it's probably all gone, looted, destroyed."

Abe looked at her, "I'm sure your family will help you get back on your feet."

She nodded as if to say, I thought as much.

"So, um. Old man, this is Rebecca and Lee Ozera. Becca, this is my old man, Ibrahim Mazur. So we better get going." I said, moving towards the car. "Vika, you've already got the keys in your bag."

She nodded then realised she'd been caught, "Bitch." she called and we both laughed.

Abe looked at us funny as we jumped into the car, Christian right behind me and Carla, his hand on the small of my back, distracting me from wanting to shut the door in Abe's face, just for a laugh. He gave me a small grin as we sat together, his leg pressed against the side of mine and no room between us for his arm, so he draped it over the back of my seat, while Carla sat on the end seat next to me and giggled at us.

We smiled down at her as she wiggled on her seat and grinned back at us, "Mummy, can you tell me who my daddy is now?"

I glanced back at Christian, looking for his approval to let her know, he nodded and I looked back at Carla, "Chris is your daddy honey, I didn't tell you because I was scared of telling him that I loved him but now he knows and I know he loves me, and you, so we are telling you that Chris is your dad."

"Really? Chrissy is my dad?" she asked.

"Yes, my precious. You're my baby girl." he said smiling at her.

She launched her little body into his arms and giggled, "Dad, I think you're funny."

Just as Chris was about to answer her, Abe climbed into the limo and took the empty seat across from us. He gave Carla a look and she slid off Chris' lap and into her own seat. "So," he began, "Do tell me what's been happening, starting with your daughter, and possibly ending with the fight at Lord and Lady Ozera's house in Australia."

"Well, I do believe I shall start at the start and end at the end, but only if you stop glaring at your only, as far as I know, grandchild." I replied. "So it was like this..."

I went on to tell him about how before I left saw Adrian and he was trying to get into my pants, after I saw him and Lissa together, leaving with Christian, the phone call, which ended in me and Chris doing things, having Christian leave because he was falling in love with me after that night, finding out I was pregnant, handling everything on my own, having to find someone to care for Carla while I was trying to find someway to deal with the darkness.

We stopped long enough to order our food, climbed back into the cars to start the drive to Baia and ate in the car whilst I continued to tell Abe of how I found Becca and how I told her about how I was looking for a temporary carer for Carla, and a spirit user who knew about darkness.

"And that's when I went to Australia, the only problem was I ended up on the wrong coast and had to catch a train to the right place, then I had Carla in Australia and took her to Becca and when I got there, Christian was there and..."

It went on, all the different places me and Chris went to try and find a spirit user who knew how to dispel the darkness from me or could tell me how to do it myself and finally ending with "So we went to get her and got attacked, during the fight I got a cut on my arm and when Vika grabbed me, something silver fell out and I lost consciousness after that."

"We got Rose onto the plane and that's when things really went down hill, she died but between me and Vika we got her breathing again and she woke up a couple of hours later and she felt like she needed to feed and she was experiencing these weird things, but from that she realised she was a spirit user and that she wasn't bonded to Lissa any more." Christian continued where I couldn't. "And that's when I told her I loved her and I don't want to be without her." he glanced at me. "She's amazing."

Abe looked between my blushing face and Christian's honest one and sighed, "I should've realised that you would fall in love, you're so alike yet different at the same time and you both were so against the other being with someone else."

"What? Old man, you're dreaming." I said.

"Well, Rose, when you first noticed that Christian wanted to be with Vasilisa, you did everything you could to stop him from telling her. Christian when you found that Rose was giving Adrian a chance at a relationship, how did you feel?"

"It pissed me off that she would give that womaniser a chance when she never really gave anyone else one, so what's your point?" Christian asked.

"You really thought that?" I asked, "That I never gave anyone else a chance?"

"I used to, but then I figured that I was being stupid and you had given others a chance, I mean you loved Dimitri and Mason in a way, hell you still probably love Eddie as a brother, but I just felt like no one cared about me, especially after Lissa broke my heart by kissing Aaron." he was looking down, so I couldn't see his face, but I pulled out my magic and saw that while the deep red was still there, there was that pale green again as well as a light grey colour.

"Tell me exactly how you're feeling right now." I said gently to Chris, he looked into my eyes and I watched both his face and his aura when he answered.

"I feel nervous and ashamed, nervous that you wont take what I say the right way and ashamed that I was in love with you even then and I didn't see it or realise it until we were together." he gave me a small smile, "Does that help?"

It had helped a lot, as he told me about the emotions he was feeling the corresponding colour had glowed slightly, "Were you nervous when we were alone on the plane?"

His face exploded with colour, "Just a little bit."

I smiled, "I have an explanation for that pale green colour now and I know what light grey means too." I poked my tongue out and did a little happy dance even in the limited space of my seat.

Abe frowned at me, "So that means what?"

"You should know dad, you're the one that told me I was a spirit user. One of the things about being a spirit user is that I can see auras, swirling colours that tell me how you're feeling and right now you're not believing a word that comes out of my mouth." I had seen the swirl in his aura, the sapphire blue was beautiful, "I think that the sapphire blue means disbelief, don't you baba?"

"Humph, you're yet to amaze me with your gift." he replied.

Christian laughed, "If you'd seen what I saw, you'd be amazed too."

"Ok then dad, think of something that changes you emotions like losing someone you care about or being with someone you love." I said. "But don't tell me about it."

"Fine."

He closed his eyes and I watched as a plain red circled through his aura, "You're thinking of someone you love, probably Janine."

He nodded, "Ok, so what about this?"

His aura shifted and I saw a light sea blue and a pale green, "You're thinking about something that is making you sad and nervous. Did someone you know die?" I asked.

"No, I was thinking about how stupid I was to not tell you these things from the start and I'm nervous because I don't want to stuff this up, I want my daughter back." he looked at me and I could see his sincerity and sadness in his eyes, "I'm getting older, Rose, and I'm not going to be around forever."

I didn't need to see his aura to see how he was feeling for a change, it was written all over his face, so I said softly, "Dad, I want you to meet Carla Marie Ozera-Bardica, your granddaughter, mine and Christian's daughter." I placed my hand on Carla's shoulder and she smiled at him. "Carla, this is your granddaddy, and he's a giant teddy bear when it comes to his family, so you'll be able to get whatever you want if you're a good girl."

Dad laughed and help out his arms, "Can I have a cuddle or are you scared of this bear?"

Carla giggled and looked at me, "Mummy, grandpa's funny. I think he has a screw loose or something."

I nodded, "Quite possible, best not to get on his bad side then, huh?"

She laughed and jumped into Abe's arms, "Grandpa, are you like auntie Vika, or like daddy?"

"Um," he glanced at me and I opened my mouth and licked one of my fangs, "I'm like mummy and daddy, I can do magic like dad, too."

"You can make fire?" she squealed. "Me and dad play kick the fireball, it's so much fun."

I turned sharply to Christian, "Didn't I tell you not to play games with her that involve fire? Christ sake Christian, she could get seriously hurt! And then what were you going to do when she was hurt? How were you gonna get her treated at a human hospital when her blood is different from theirs?" I was beyond angry, my magic exploded and I saw his aura but I was too angry to look at it closely. "How could you put her life in danger like that?"

"It's unacceptable, and I wont ever do it again, I swear to you Rose, I shouldn't have done it in the first place." I could see his aura more clearly now, the copper, amber, brown and pale green colours swirled together in intricate patterns that were somehow soothing my nerves. "I'm sorry. I didn't think of those things and I definitely should've listened to you as you're her mother and you know best."

"It's not fine, but I will hold you to you word, whether you're her father or not, I hate it when people put children in danger." the colours had slowed down but I could still see that he was feeling them and I was glad he was, but in with those colours was a streak of teal. "I just don't want to lose her."

"Yes, and I for one wont take any of this crap either, not with my granddaughter's life at stake." Abe had to butt in. "I agree with Rose, it's a stupid thing to have done, if I hear that you're doing it again, I will do various not nice things to you that you wouldn't like, and I'm sure Rose wont for that matter either."

"Dad, stop with the threats to my man, I may be moroi, but I sure as hell can still kick arse better than you." I sighed and turned back to Chris, "No more fire kick-ball, ok?"

"No more, I promise." he replied.

"Well, then I guess now that that's all out, are you going to return to court any time soon? Or is that just wishful thinking that you'll reconcile with your friends and maybe see Janine."

"We'll see, old man. I'm not sure if I want to go back, what with me and Chris being together and having a daughter and the bond being gone. I'm not sure I'm ready to face all that." I sighed, "I'll think about it though."

I felt the car come to a stop and looked out the window, there was a tree laid out across the road and from the look of the stump, it wasn't an accident that it had fallen down in our path. I pulled my stake from it's holster on my hip and moved to the door, ready to jump out the moment there was trouble.

"Rose, you can't go out there, you're not a damphir any more." dad said.

"If you think I'm just gonna sit here while Vika, Pavel and Mike all try to protect not just us but another car full of people, then you're crazier than a spirit user. I can help, I just need to do something first." I concentrated my magic like I had felt Lissa do when she was going to charm something and pushed at it, trying to get it to go into the stake laying in my hands. With the other magic in there it was hard to work around but after a few moments more, I managed it and I moved out of the car, taking my fighters stance as they came out of the shadows, surrounding us and forcing us to try and cover both the cars.

_Damn this road, can't ever travel it without getting into a damn fight, _I thought_ just wanna get home and have Carla safe._

"What do we have here?" a woman's voice cut through the silence of the pre-dawn air, "'Cause from the looks of it, there's three moroi children, five adults, four of which are royal and only three guardians."

Another one replied, "I don't know but Missy here thinks she can fight. Awe look, she's even got her own stake!"

They were taunting us, and I hated it. They started laughing at us when I heard one of the car doors open, I glanced over to see Christian climb out and saunter over to where I was standing, looking like he didn't have a care in the world and that there wasn't an angry hoard of blood thirsty monsters trying to kill us.

"Thought you might like to relive our school days,Hathaway. I light 'em up, you knock 'em down, yeah?" he asked me, not even bothering to try and hide our conversation from them, but then it's not like they wouldn't be able to hear us even if we whispered, the only difference was that this way it looked like we weren't scared of them. "What do you say, babe?"

"Sure thing, Ozera. Let's teach them not to mess with our family." I replied, ginning.

He moved so he was just behind me, looking over my shoulder and I pulled a second stake out of my ankle holder, holding the spirit charmed stake in my left hand so I could fight better, I wanted to save them but being as defenceless as Lissa had been after changing Dimitri back was not on my to do list, so I knew that people who could have been saved were going to die, but it was like this, if I didn't win, they'd take Carla or do worse, and I couldn't let that happen.

"Hey guys, I just realised something, Mrs Karp, why don't you step forward and see how your students have fared, living while you're dead?" my voice carried over the, now silent group of killers. "Or are you afraid of the small insignificant pupil that you compelled all those years ago, to take Vasilisa away because they were coming to get her, just like they were going to get you, will beat you?"

I heard a snarl and then her voice, "Kill them all but her, we need her blood to walk in the sunshine. She's the pure heart."

Laughing, I bowed, "Thanks, but it seems that you're all disposable as far as she's concerned, and to be honest, I wouldn't trust her, she might just take all my blood for herself and kill you all before she does."

The first one threw himself at Vika, trying to catch her off-guard, and he failed wonderfully, but that was when the others began to attack.

Somewhere between kicking this guy in the head and staking the chick with him, it was brought to my attention that Sonja Karp had moved and was now draining the life out of Mike, who was slumped over and even from my spot I could see that he was dead.

The guy I was fighting with screamed at me as he saw his girl fall and swung a branch at me, knocking me back a few paces, "Do you know how long it took me to train her to be good at everything she did? Including in the bedroom, maybe I should keep you to take her place!" he snarled at me.

"Just try it dickhead and see how fast you find my stake shoved up your arse!" I yelled back, "Just 'cause she's good in bed don't mean shit, I reckon you were blinded by your lust 'cause I killed her easy as!"

He snarled and lunged at me, trying to kick me in the side. I moved easily, stepping out and kicking him in the back. He recovered quickly and lashed out with his nails to my face, causing a small scratch on my cheek, as I had pulled back just in time. I slashed him in the face with the spirit charmed stake and he howled, throwing his head back and grabbing it with his hands. I pulled my right hand up and slammed my stake into his heart as he fell to the ground from my foot being hooked around his leg.

Glancing up, I saw Sonja take a look at her fallen army and flicked a dark look at me before she ran off. Unthinkingly I ran after her, forgetting that Carla still needed to be taken somewhere safe and only thinking of the promise I had made to Mikhail.

Tearing through the underbrush I came across her kneeling in a clearing, rocking back and forth as if she was crying, and pulling at her hair, "Mrs Karp?" I asked.

She spun off the ground in a move so quick I never saw it coming. She hit out at me, her hands coming into contact with my shoulder, leg and chest, I fought back as best I could, keeping the spirit charmed stake from her view until I could use it.

He hand clumped around my shoulder and she grabbed at me again and again until she had me pinned to a tree by my throat, my right arm broken and dislocated, hanging limp from the shoulder, down. My stake gone somewhere on the forest floor, her laughter crackled through the air.

"Well, I guess I got you after all, Rosemarie dear. It's too bad that I need all your blood, you'd make a great strigoi, even as a moroi you are a great fighter, yes. Ah but you would also be a big risk to have around." she seemed to be holding a conversation with herself, "What to do, drain you here, or take you home?"

"How about neither?" I asked and stabbed her in the heart with the spirit charmed stake from my left hand.

A blinding white light shot out of her and I, merging together and opening me up to healing her soul, I did what I thought was right, healing like I had done with the cut on my arm and hoping I was doing it right and wasn't going to kill her. I knew now how hard it had been on Lissa to do this to Dimitri and for that I was awed by her strength.

It was getting to the point that I couldn't take much more when it stopped and I felt the rush of Sonja's healed soul move back into her body. I watched as her eyes opened into the night air, she took in a deep breath, taking in the beauty of the night and I could see the tears gather in the corner of her eyes.

"It's ok, Sonja. I'm here." I whispered as she started to sob.

She looked into my eyes, "You saved me, why? I've done such horrible things."

"Everyone deserves a second chance some more than others, and I made a promise to someone who helped me a whole lot when I was trying to save Dimitri." I smiled at her tear- stained face, "By the way, Mikhail says 'hi,' and I have a feeling that he still loves you. It might have been the look in his eyes or maybe it was the way that he asked me if I managed to find a way save Dimitri, could I try to save you too."

She began sobbing hysterically as she threw herself into my arms, repeating over and over that she was so grateful and would make it up to me somehow. I stroked her hair saying that it was fine and she didn't owe me anything, and soon enough she fell into an exhausted sleep, still mumbling about how she was so grateful. I felt like falling asleep myself but I needed to get back to the car before dad took off with the others.

Pulling Sonja up into my arms, I stood up and wavered a little as my energy dropped and I was forced to walk at a slow pace back to the road and the cars, following the feeling of Becca's aura as she was a spirit user too.

It was hard going, and I hadn't taken into consideration how far we'd gone, I couldn't even hear them talking, and I only had a light sense of where Becca was, the best thing about being a spirit user that I had found so far, the ability to sense other spirit users and where they are.

I made it to the road just in time to hear Abe call out for me and that if I didn't hurry up then he was leaving without me.

"Sorry to say, but if you leave without her you'll be taking the Ozera's with you and Christian will be staying here with me and Carla to try and find her." Vika called out.

"Well if he wishes to place his life at risk that's fine, but not my granddaughter, there is no way in hell I'll be leaving her here to get hurt or worse!" he was pissed.

"Don't worry about it, I'm already here!" I yelled out before Christian could have a go at Abe for wanting to take Carla away. "But I do need a hand thanks, restoring strigoi to themselves sucks especially the energy drop and now I'm totally drained."

"Rose!" Christian called, striding over to were I was walking, "Are you ok? Who's that, did you turn her back?"

"It's Mrs Karp, yeah I did. I'm fine, but really tired." I replied.

"I bet you are, Lissa passed out not even five minutes after she staked Dimitri." he said, "Let me take her. Vika, come help Rose!"

His hands slid around Sonja's still form and he pulled her against his chest, I stayed standing long enough to stumble a few steps before the ground seemed to rush up to meet me but I was out before I hit.

**Copper means guilt, amber means apologetic, brown means determination, pale green means nervousand teal means relief **

**xoxo Kye**


	12. The Wisdom of the Young and a Quick Bite

**Chapter 10: The Wisdom of the Young and a Quick Bite.**

Coming awake in the back of Abe's limo was surreal, I didn't know how I had got there or when it had happened, it was all like a strange dream, until I saw Sonja. It was just me and Abe on one side while Sonja was sitting on the opposite side to us, her hands in her lap, her eyes down cast on the floor.

"She's awake." she said and I glanced at Abe as he looked at me.

"Hey dad." I said, and looked back at Sonja, "How are you feeling now?" I asked softly, "I know its hard to talk about it, but I'm here to listen, ok?"

She looked up into my eyes, "So you don't care that I did this to myself, you still want to help me?"

"Yes, I know that while it was a conscious decision on your part, you weren't entirely in the right mind to make most of the decisions that you did on a daily basis, but you did it to escape the madness of spirit magic." I replied.

"Yeah, it was getting way to much for me, it felt like my mind was telling me that everyone was against me and that they were trying to hurt me and if I turned then I could be free of them and possibly teach them a lesson for trying to hurt me." she sighed and I could see the tears gathering in the corner of her eyes as she dropped her head down to look into her lap, "I just wanted to feel normal and no matter what I did, it wasn't working so I gave in and turned after they tried to lock me up in Tarasov, I couldn't be behind bars without any plants around me."

I reached my hand out and placed it on her arm, "I know, Sonja, I know."

She looked up into my face, "You're a spirit user Rose?" she asked.

Nodding I said, "Yeah, but my mum, dad and I came to an agreement when I was little that because of my DNA, which stopped me from needing to drink blood, we decided that they would mask my magic and I would look and act like a damphir so that we could prove to the queen that moroi could fight beside damphirs to protect our people." I glanced at Abe and could see the surprise on his face, that I was making it so it was my decision, "I had to pretend that Janine was my mum growing up so as not to let anyone in on the secret. But when everything started going bad what with my being bonded to Lissa, having feelings for Dimitri but being in a relationship with Adrian, and then having Dimitri shut me out after I found out how to turn strigoi back and had Lissa stake him, then to walk in on Lissa and Adrian, well let's just say 'together' it got too much so I left with Christian and we travelled, had a daughter and become close. But we got into a fight with a group of strigoi and one of them cut the device that hid my magic, but then I died and Vika and Christian saved me and now I have to drink blood or I will die."

"Wow, that's a lot of stress, how are you dealing with it all?" she asked, "Does anyone else know about what you've been though?"

"Well, my dad, Christian and Vika know and now you, so that's enough people for me. But there's some good things to come of all this, I have Carla and Christian, and now I get to help you get your life on track before you go back." I sighed, "The only thing is, I loved Janine like a mum but we had a fight and now we're not talking, then me and dad fought because I fought with Janine, I haven't spoken to my mates Mia and Eddie in over four months and I'm worried about them."

She grinned at me, "Well, as for your friends, call them, find out if they're ok. Same goes for Janine, if you still love her than show it, I'm sure your dad has her number if you don't. Things look like they're looking up for you and your dad already. As for Dimitri, don't let the hurt he caused you mess with your current relationship. Don't let Lissa bully you into being anything to her if you don't want to, she doesn't deserve your loyalty if she's going to do those things behind your back. Same goes with Adrian, it might have been a one time thing or it might have been going on for a while, now that you've moved on if they bring it up, tell them how much it hurt you, and then tell them you don't care about it any more." she took a breath, "Or you could confront them about it and try and find out why they did it."

"Or I might not even go back there at all." I said.

"So your not going to take me back to Mikhail?" she asked a I could feel her sadness without having to read her aura.

"Well, there is that. I will be taking you back, but I want to make sure you don't have any lingering strigoi tendencies left and that you can adapt back into everyday life without too much hassle." I sighed, "A big job for both of us."

She nodded, "Understandable, but what's going to happen when we get their?"

"I am going to send a missive to the Queen to say that you have been turned back and that for safety reasons I am keeping you at a distance from court so we can spend more time working on sleeping and eating habits, as well as working with your magic and finding ways to prevent darkness build ups again, for not just you but other spirit users too." I sighed, "So when you go back they'll probably do the same tests for you that they did with Dimitri, but they wont keep you locked up and under constant guard."

"They did that to Dimitri?" she asked, "Wait, which Dimitri?"

"Dimitri Belikov. He's the one that found us at took us back to school, and then I fell in love with him, well I thought it was love but really wasn't 'cause it's got nothing on me and Christian." I grinned, "Then strigoi took him when the school was attacked and he was turned. I hunted him, he caught me, tried to make me his new puppet, didn't work because I escaped and then I found a way to change him back by staging a breakout at Tarasov and freed the guy who was out to get Lissa and by the way he's still free, damn it. Dimitri caught Lissa and Christian and she staked him like I did to you and so he swore undying devotion and protection to her and pushed me away, which I see as a good thing now."

She nodded, "Dimitri Belikov, didn't his charge die on someone else's watch?"

"Yeah, he took his first home leave in over four years and went to see him family, he hadn't left Ivan for five years and the first time he did he died, so I could see why he was the best person to leave Lissa in the care of." I sighed, "Even though she was being a bitch to me, I still want her safe, if not for me then for her family, they were like my own for a while and I loved them as they loved me."

She nodded and glanced at dad, "Do you think that I deserve a second chance or should I have been killed back on the road like the others?"

"I believe that everyone deserves a second chance, some way more than others, I know that if you hadn't been out of your mind, you wouldn't have turned." he answered, "You are a nice woman and I think that you weren't in control."

"You truly think that I deserve a second chance?"

"I do, absolutely." he replied. "It may take some getting used to but, we are here to help you and if there is anything you need, just ask Rose and she'll get it for you and if she can't, she'll ask me to get it."

Nodding I turned back to Sonja, "This road you walk isn't going to be easy, but I need you to stick with it and help me help you." I smiled softly, "It might not be easy for you to talk about your feelings but I need to know how certain things make you feel so I can help you deal or understand them, ok?"

"That's fine, I can try my hardest to be open to you, but I don't know how well that will go, I'm normally a shy secretive person, but I will try." she replied, her dedication shinning on her face, "I have to, if I want to see Mikhail again, don't I?"

"You don't have to but it may take longer for you to get better, so therefore longer before you do see him." I replied. "It may take some time but we'll get you there and soon you will be running into Mikhail's open arms."

"Did you mean what you said in the forest before, that he does still want me?"

"Absolutely, I believe 100% that he still wants you, still loves you. By the way, did you heal my arm?" I asked, rolling my shoulder. "It feels as good as new." "Um, I thought that since I was the one to hurt you and well, you were holding me even though you were in pain, it was the least I could've done for you. I mean I owe you a life debt, you saved mine, I have to save you or do something of equal value for it to be void." she smiled at me. "So, what ever-."

"No, you don't owe me anything, but I have only one thing to ask of you." I remembered my time after Dimitri was turned back, and while I didn't love him any more, it still hurt to think that he had pushed me away. "Whatever you do, don't push away the people who love you and who want to help you. We only want what's best and while some people may be over-baring and need a kick to the teeth, all you have to do is politely decline their help, but still let them be there for you."

She looked closer at me, "He really hurt you, didn't he?"

"Yes, yes he did. But if he didn't I wouldn't be where I am today. And for that I am grateful. He's not the love of my life, Chris is. And I can honestly say that, while we were in school, I never would've seen us together, but now I can't see us apart." I sighed dreamily, "Christian has been there for me through everything these last few years and I'll be damned if I let one of the only stable things in my life go. Dimitri is like a brother to me now, and while we're not talking I can say that I would tell him that if I was to see him tomorrow."

She smiled at me, "Even with my shield up, your aura glows so bright I can see it while your father's is blank to me. I've never seen a love so strong, anywhere, ever."

Blushing I glanced at Abe out of the corner of my eye and I realised something, something that made me turn very serious and focused, "Old Man, where is my other half and our daughter?"

He chuckled, "They are in the front, I was worried about Sonja here but now I see there was no need to be, however we are at the, uhm, feeding house in Baia, so you may go in and then the Ozera's and I shall head to my home and you, Christian, Carla and Sonja can head to the Belikov house."

As he spoke we had come to a stop and I could hear giggling coming from the front seat and the sweet sound of Christian's voice telling Carla to settle down.

Without waiting I jumped up and grabbed Sonja's hand, "You thirsty?" I asked and instantly felt her fear, "Don't worry, I'm gonna look after you."

She looked into my eyes, "Are you sure that you can, what if I go psycho again?"

"Then I'll help you, just like I just promised. Trust me Sonja, I'll look after you and you _will _be fine. I promise you wont hurt anyone, and if you do go 'psycho' I'll look after you and stop you, ok?"

She looked into my eyes and I knew that she was seeing my determination not to let her hurt herself or others as well as my need to look after her coming out to play, she needed someone to be by her side so she wouldn't fear _herself_, so she could re-learn how to live in the normal, or as normal as it gets, world.

In turn I could feel her fear, her guilt, her feeling of not being good enough or worthy of the gift that had been handed to her. I could feel her self-loathing and anger, and all I wanted was to show her that it wasn't her who had done those things.

After a moment she nodded and I said, "The past is called the past for a reason, leave it there. The present is a gift, cherish it while you can. The future is what we make it, something only we can shape."

She looked down then back into my eyes, "I'll try to remember that, and that it took someone who's eight years younger than me to say it for me to realise that it's true. But I just want to hide away and never come out."

"There are going to be days when you don't have the energy or drive to get out of bed. There are going to be days when you are going to want to give up – give up on love, happiness and life. The thing is, I wont let you give up. You were given a life and you're supposed to live it. The truth is the seventy or eighty years you're given isn't long enough to do all the things you're supposed to do. Sure, you're going to hit a few bumps along the way, but you've got to pick yourself up and move on. Life is unpredictable and things might not always work out the way you want them to, but that's no reason to give up. You're here for a reason and someday when you're not expecting it, you're going to discover your reason for being here. And when that does happen, your life will never be the same. And I will be standing here telling you I knew you could do it, I knew you could turn this 'bump' into a good thing." I grinned at her, "Words of wisdom that I picked up off the net. But it's true, you_ can and will _get through this and I will be there, whether physically or just a phone call away, if you ever need me, and I mean if it's 3:50 in the morning and you need me, call or come to my room, I wont turn you away, unless it's something Mikhail can deal with like a spider in the shower."

"Thank you, Rose." she said softly, looking down with tears in her eyes, "That means a lot to me that you would go out of your way for me. No one really has in my life."

"Well, that's just me." I replied, "For those that need it I'll be there, and I can tell you that you are one of those people."

She smiled and we stepped out of the car, hand in hand and I squeezed hers before letting go and scoping up the small girl that ran into my arms and spinning her around and hugging her sexy as hell father, who kissed me on the cheek and whispered dirty things in my ear while I laughed.

"Can you take Carla while I go with Sonja, she's a little nervous about being in Russia." I lied smoothly, "She doesn't want to do something wrong and freak out."

Christian saw my lie for what it was but smiled, "Sure thing hun, anything you say so long as I can share your bed tonight."

I laughed at the murderous look on my father's face, "Not tonight babe, I've gotta get both Carla and Sonja settled and I'll probably be up and down all night, not that I mind. Besides, tomorrow we've gotta start looking for our own place."

The moment the words were out of my mouth I knew that it was the right thing, as much as I loved living with the Belikovs, my little family, including Sonja was going to need it's own home. And we were going to need one soon. Having all of us in the one house, Christian, Carla, Sonja and me in a house that had been crowded when I was staying here by myself when I was hunting Dimitri, was going to be hard, especially since there were another two children to add to the Belikov family since then as well.

"Our own place?" Christian asked, "That sounds great, but it would have to be here, where we can be close to your family, since you dad spends most of his time here and there is your adopted family."

He had pinned me there, I wanted to live here and make trips to court if needed because of those two reasons, but there was one he hadn't thought of, "What about your Aunt Tasha?" I asked, to be honest, I didn't know how I was going to react to seeing her after all this time, but if Christian wanted her in his life I wouldn't stop him from seeing her. I would, however not let her know where we lived until I was sure she meant no harm to Carla, or me.

His face twisted, "I'm not sure I want her in our lives. I mean after what happened before we left, I'm still angry at her but she was like a mother to me." he shrugged.

Pulling him to me, I squeezed his shoulder, "If she means that much then call her, but for the love of God, don't tell her where we live until we know if she's going to pull any stunts like then. I don't want Carla to get hurt because of her."

His eye lit up, I knew that he knew one of the reasons I had wanted to leave was because Tasha had got with Dimitri two days after he had told me love fades, but what only Chris knew, was that she had come to my room right after and had rubbed it in my face, saying that I was 'a two bit whore' and that 'she would always win because she had more class' than me. "Are you sure Rose?" he asked. "I don't have-."

"No, it's fine. I think it was just because of _him_ that she did it, I hope that they are both happy, as well as Adrian and _her_." I smiled at his confused face, "It just means that they wont start trouble for us if they are happy too."

We walked in, hand in hand and Abe put us on the list to go next, in pairs. I sat between Sonja and Carla with Christian on Carla's other side and The Ozera's beside Sonja.

They were called in first, then Dad and Christian next, then finally me and Sonja.

Walking down the hall, I could feel her nerves and I slowly began to give her a little confidence and I watched as she walked taller and smiled a little before the door was shut behind us.

The guy in front of us raised his head and gave us a small smile, "Hmm two beautiful ladies all for me, one at a time or both, your pick."

Glancing at Sonja, I replied, "One at a time, you'll enjoy it more. After you Son."

He grinned at me, "Smart woman."

Sonja leaned forward and bit his neck and the smell of his blood hit me, making me wish to have taken his offer, but soon enough Sonja stopped and I could feel her happiness at herself for not having to be pulled off him.

I didn't wait long and soon my own fangs were piercing the skin on the other side on his neck. The taste exploded on my tongue, he was sweet yet had a spicy kick, almost like a mild chilli smothered in chocolate sauce.

I loved it, and knew my fear of not liking it was stupid. I had worried about not liking drinking blood to the point that I would sort of starve myself until necessary or that the taste would make me sick after.

Once I had drank my fill, I turned to see what Sonja's reaction was. She was watching the blood run down the guys neck, possibly thinking about licking it off but she refrained and we walked out, leaving him to his high and out into the pre-dawn air, ready to head to the Belikovs' house.

As we walked out I noticed Abe's limo was gone and that Christian was leaning against the side of our rental car, while Vika slept, leaning on the inside of the car but Carla was nowhere to be seen. I gave him a look that spoke legions but all he did was glance behind him, telling me that she was in the car, possibly asleep.

"Your old man took Becca, Lee and their kids back to his, said something about seeing you after we had all had a good nights' sleep, and that he had called Olena and asked about Sonja being there and she had said it was fine, they're working on the room situation right now." he grinned at me, wrapping his arms around my waist, "Apparently, I'm sharing with Paul and Aleski. You my dear are sharing with Ms K, and Carla is in with Zoya and Vika. By the way, I love you."

"That should be fine and guess what? I love you too," I said back, "Lets go, I'll drive since Vika's asleep, and well I like being alive so we're going to leave her alone."

He nodded, "That I can totally agree with, I don't want to lose my head because you woke her up." he laughed and I watched as he climbed into the back and shifted Carla around so he could hold her while we drove and Sonja jumped into the front passenger seat. Sighing I hoped in, started the car and drove us home, thinking about everything we needed to do, everything we need to plan.

As I drove I made a list in my head of things we needed, _our own home with enough rooms for me and Chris; one for Carla and another for Sonja as well as a spare room in case of visitors and a few others for when we have more children, and a small cottage for the Guardians, furniture, our own car, Christian really needs to learn Russian; as does Carla. I need to get Carla enrolled in school, get a part-time job, study spirit magic and learn how to control the darkness or just get rid of it, if we could... that might work, I'll have to work on it. _I sighed, it was a lot to do in such a short time. I knew most of it needed to be done before the end of the week or I wouldn't have the motivation to do it after, I just got comfy where I was.

Arriving back at the Belikov household, I jumped out of the car and was engulfed by a strong, warm pair of arms that made me feel like home. I hugged her back and smiled softly.

"Я рад, что ты дома, мы волновались о тебе." Yeva said, " У быть более осторожным в следующий раз, мы не хотим потерять тебя навсегда и должны сказать, как ваши матери."

"Oh, Yeva. You know me. I can't stay away for long, I'd miss Olena's black bread too much!" I smiled, as the others climbed out I said, "Вы знаете, я всегда буду возвращаться домой. Это место, где я принадлежу. Здесь я принадлежу."

She smiled, "It's good to have you all back, including you, Sonja Karp. I hope you see things they way they should be soon, I would hate for you to miss something that important." she surprised us all by speaking English.

"Babushka!?" Vika said.

"Oh, fluff it, Vika." she replied and walked back inside.

It was too much to say that we were stunned, "Did she just say 'Fluff it' or was that my sleep deprived mind playing tricks on me?" I asked.

"Nope, I heard it too." Vika replied. "The scary Russian grandmother strikes again."

_**Translations:**_

"Я рад, что ты дома, мы волновались о тебе." =

"I'm glad you're home, we were worried about you."

" У быть более осторожным в следующий раз, мы не хотим потерять тебя навсегда и должны сказать, как ваши матери." =

Do be more careful next time, we don't want to lose you permanently and have to tell both your mothers.

"Вы знаете, я всегда буду возвращаться домой. Это место, где я принадлежу. Здесь я принадлежу." =

You know I'll always come home. It's where I belong. HERE is where I belong.


	13. The Quiet Life, Sorta

**Chapter 11: The Quiet Life, Sorta...**

_Just the Way You Are – Bruno Mars_

It took me a few weeks to find the right house, but I was fine, Christian kept me motivated, in his own way. Carla took to the Belikovs' like they were her long lost family; getting into mischief with Zoya and Aleski, fighting with Vika about who's turn it was in the bathroom and eating everything Olena cooked without complaint, it was like she had grown up with them her whole life. And I was glad of that, because it meant that she liked it here and was happy. Sonja had a few issues that I'd been helping her with, like her feeling as though she didn't need to sleep or the fact that she feels weird when she eats, like it's something she shouldn't be doing, but the hardest was when she did sleep, the nightmares that plagued her dreams scared even me. The only thing I had yet to do is send my message to the Queen, but I knew Becca had spoken to her for me so everything should be fine when I did.

Running down the stairs, I giggled, "It's prefect Chris!" I yelled, "When can we move in? I got dibs on the room with the bathroom!"

"Rose, calm down! It's our house so the master bedroom is ours anyway." he laughed, "I think we can move in now, since we have the keys and the moneys come out of our bank accounts. So where do you want to start?"

Spinning around, I looked into the lounge room, thinking about the how I wanted everything set up and what colours I wanted it to be, it was going to be fun; decorating my own home, not having to move any more unless it was our choice. I was looking forward to being domestic and it kinda scared me.

Walking back up the stairs, I pulled a note book and some tape out of my bag. I wrote across the top what room was going to be and then stuck it to the doors, making sure that Carla's room was near ours and that Sonja had her own privacy. Until I had decided how I wanted the rooms and bought the stuff to go in them, there was no point in trying to buy things.

A few moments later Christian came up the stairs, "Ok, so why did you want me to bring the tape measure and what do you need it for?"

"I need you to get the sizes of all the rooms so that way I can make a blue print of what I want it to look like and how big the stuff I get can be so that way it doesn't overcrowd the room." I smiled at his stunned expression, "Didn't think I'd do it, did ya? You thought I would go out and just buy stuff and say 'oh let's put this here and that there' didn't you? I mean, before I would have but this is for us, not just me."

He smiled, "I'm glad you think so, and this Suzy Home-maker vibe you have going is really working in your favour, I think I might like seeing you being a housewife." he laughed, "But I don't see you staying at home all the time, or being overly domestic."

Laughing, I pushed him slightly, "Can you get started, the sooner you get the measurements and write them on this page the sooner I can work on the rooms, the sooner we can get the stuff, the sooner we can move in and have some, _alone _time."

His eyes darkened with lust at the word alone and he grabbed me, wrapping his arms around my waist, "Hmm, I like the sound of that, but does this 'alone time' mean that we can sleep next to each other in our own bed, I can hold you all night and wake up next to you every morning? Or does this 'alone time' mean that we're going to be making a younger brother or sister for Carla?"

Pushing one of my hands up into his hair and tilting his head down for a kiss, I murmured against his lips, "Maybe a little of both." I kissed him with all the love I felt for him, "Definitely both, I think, actually."

He grinned against my lips, "Good, because I've wanted you under me since before we went to get Carla, I just wanted you to be sure of what you wanted."

I could feel his cheekiness radiating off him and smirked, "I know you have and I've been trying to give you hints that I want you too, or do you think I normally forget to take my clothes to the shower when no one but you are home? But remember them when others are there?"

His grin was gone, "Is that why Vika kept taking Carla to the park when everyone else was doing stuff?"

"Yep," I said popping the _p_. "But you never did come to my room and I got so lonely I had to double-click my own mouse, if you catch my drift?"

"You played with yourself?" he whispered, "Because of me?"

I ran my finger down the front of his shirt, pretending I was going to shove my hand in his pants before turning away, "Now that would be telling." I said as I walked back down the stairs, "Now get a start on those rooms," then added as an after thought, "Please."

Laughing Chris walked into the first room on my list, Carla's room. "Sure thing hun, it's nice you said please though."

Sighing, I walked out the back and began pacing off the yard, knowing that it would be to hard to accurately measure it with a small measuring tape, and besides, I felt like I needed the exercise. In my head I could feel as these plans I wanted to do to the yard, plant a vegetable garden for me and Carla to grow, build a cubby house with slides and swings for Carla and her friends and siblings, make a track around the yard on the extra grounds (which had been used for horse riding before we bought the place) for me to run on _and I'll make Christian run too, work off some of that sexual frustration._ I laughed out loud, _serves him right for making me wait._ The pool was clear and looked good, but I was thinking about what to do to the pool house and how I was going to set that up. One of the things about living just outside of town on a massive piece of land, was the privacy. There was the main house which looked like it had just came straight out of the screen of a horror movie, but looked way better than those shabby derelicts. It had two cottages, both with three rooms each. One next to the main house, which I had decided was for the feeders, the second for visiting families that wanted their own privacy, was down the back, away from the road and the house but not so much so that it would take to long to get there. All three opened up into the fully enclosed yard.

Rushing back inside and up stairs to Chris, who was now in our room, I grabbed the book off him and wrote down my measurements. Grinning I gave it back, "Hurry up then, I'm so bored."

He laughed, a sound that I loved more and more every time I heard it, "Last room, then we can head back. And tonight you can make your plans for our house but let Sonja do her own room and get Carla to help with hers and I will help you with ours."

"You don't mind about the other rooms?" I asked, "I can organise them on my own?"

"Well, seeing as I'm getting a job, you're going to be spending more time in the house than me, so if you organise them then you'll like them better and you wont mind being here so much." he grinned, "And you can make the pool house into your experimental darkness laboratory." He laughed evilly, and flicked his eyebrows at me, while rubbing his hands together, "You can pretend to be an evil genius."

"Wow, that's funny because I was just thinking about what I was going to do with it, I mean it's not like we actually need a pool house." I grinned, "And you can be my guinea pig! Well hurry up then!"

He marked down the last numbers and grinned at me, "All done, lets go." So we went out to his car, a flashy little convertible that was black, but the interior was the same blue as his eyes, and hoped in.

Driving back to the Belikov house was intense, Christian was going over the different things that he had to do in order to get a job, learning Russian was at the top of that list.

"I just don't really understand it, like I can't just click and go hey, that means this, I actually have to think about it, then think of what I'm going to say, and try to remember what words to use and then pray I don't stuff it up." he glanced at me and saw that while I had been listening, I was also trying not to laugh, "What?"

Unable to keep it in, my laughter burst from my lips, "Chris, you're over thinking it, you need to relax and just let the information sink into your brain, then you'll find it much easier." I slid my hand over and took a hold of his, "The more you relax the better you will learn. And it's fine to make mistakes, that's how you learn."

His face scrunched up in thought, "Maybe you can take over and teach me? It's weird having Yeva stare at me while I try to think of what she said or what to say back, I mean I'm grateful but she's scary."

I laughed again, "Ok, I will. But you were doing so well with her as your teacher, if you start going down hill, I will be sending you back."

He laughed with me and pulled into the driveway, his answer was, "Then I will try my best, Miss Bardica."

My laughter continued until I stepped out of the car and died as soon as I head something break inside the house. I picked up my pace and walked into the front room swiftly, my eyes scanning everywhere for danger, I would rather look silly than be unprepared.

Looking into the back room, I was at a loss for words when I saw Vika defiantly growl at Olena and heard her reply of "I can't believe you would choose him after what he did! And to sweet Roza of all people!"

I took a step into the room, "Vika, what's wrong?" I hesitantly asked.

"Everything, I told mama what Dimitri did to you and asked what she would do if he turned up here." She gave me a look and I could see that she was trying to look out for me, "She said that she would reorganise everyone so there was enough space for everyone! She asked why and I lost it!" She turned back to her mother, "How could you expect Roza to deal with him when she has nowhere else to go? She said that everyone would make do and you would be fine with him being here. I can't stand you being like this, it's like Michael all over again!"

"If Dimitri was to turn up what would you do Vika?" I asked quietly. "Would you throw him out or would you let him see everyone first?"

"Really Roza? As if I'd let him past the front door!" she said glancing at me.

"And why would that be, he's your brother?" I asked.

Her eyes flickered behind me and narrowed in anger. "What the hell do you think you're doing here?"

A soft voice behind me made me spin around, freezing the moment I saw him standing there, looking the same as ever. His soft brown hair hanging down to his shoulders, his duster hugging his tall frame. The only difference was his stoic guardian mask was no where to be found. I watched as Dimitri stepped into the room, his chocolate brown eyes met mine and I shivered from the look in them.

"If that's what you want Vika, I'll leave, but I did come to see mama." he said, and I felt my magic pull and his aura shifted into view, I could see the amber, copper, tan, two light shades of grey and a deep blue. "Can I just talk to her before I leave?"

"No."

"Yes."

"Get out, now."

"Viktoria, let me speak to your brother!"

"He's not my brother. Not after he hurt Rose." She looked at me and I could feel the blood draining from my face, my body shaking as I took in the man standing in front of me, "Look mama! She's so scared she shaking!" she moved forward, only to be held back by Olena, "Get out now, Dimitri! Can't you see you're hurting her?"

"Dimitri?" I asked, my body unfreezing. "When did you get here?"

"I just pulled up when I heard someone yelling. Ran into the house in time to see Christian head upstairs and the back room door swing shut." He looked at me, "If my presence here while you are here is unwelcome I can return later, if you want."

The warm sadness in his eyes made me do a double take at first, after all the last time I had seen him he was saying that maybe I should've stayed dead, then my mind caught up and the darkness hit me, this man had wished me dead and I wanted to make him hurt. I growled at him as he moved forward, causing him to stop and glance into my eyes. "Don't come near me!"

"Roza, let the darkness go. It's not you, don't give up." his voice was soft, sweet, like it had been all those years ago in the cabin, "Let it go and come here. Let me help you deal with this, I want to be here for you."

His voice was a dark, Russian accented seduction, playing on my already frayed nerves and making me want to go back to that familiar time when I had been his everything, and he had been mine before the world ripped us apart and I had to go on alone. But I held myself back, the darkness working with me to keep me in place. I was waiting, but in my darkness hazed mind, I couldn't recall what I was waiting for, but he wasn't it.

"Rose!"

A voice full of worry and understanding ripped through my haze and made me shudder, my eyes jerking from Dimitri to the blue-eyed man that ran head-first through the door. His eyes full of concern.

"Lord Ozera, don't go near her when she's like this she could hurt you." Dimitri's words cut through the silence, making Christian slow slightly, his aura lighting up with anger but then he sped up and grabbed me, pulling me into his arms.

Leaning down to whisper into into my I ear, he breathed, "I went and saw to Carla, she was in with the kids, telling them stories. Then I heard you yell and I knew the darkness had gotten to you, do you need help, or are you ok?"

Closing my eyes and listening to the soft, deep tone of his voice, I leaned into his strong body, letting the darkness go and pushing the last of my anger out. "I'm ok now, thanks Chris." I finally replied, locking my arms around his waist, "Why are you angry?"

His eyes darkened and flicked behind me, to where Dimitri was standing, "I just- can we talk later about that, there's too many ears here?"

I nodded and gave him a small smile, glad that his anger wasn't directed at me, at least that I could see. "Okay, we will talk later. Vika, it's fine. It just means that I'll have to hurry up and fix up the house."

"Roza?" She said, "But what about, about all those things you said? What about how you-"

"Vika, it's fine. I promise I will ask, but I think you should take three deep breaths and relax." she started breathing, "Remember when I said that?" I asked

"Yeah, I met up with you when you came here to see Denis and the gang." she replied. "After I graduated from school."

"Right, over three years ago, after I had Carla and had come back to make sure you knew about Dimitri." I replied, "So have you calmed down?"

"Yes, I'm sorry. I guess I thought you would still feel like that." she gave me a small smile. "I also just realised that I didn't say sorry when I saw you that day but you still spoke to me, so you really did forgive me ages ago. After Carla really, I don't remember seeing Christian there."

"He was still in Australia with Carla and Becca." I replied, "Teaching Becca how to do a little bit of fighting."

"Aww, I'm glad that he was there. But how did you deal with giving birth on your own or was someone there with you?" she asked, I could see her genuine interest in what I had to say. "Did it hurt?"

"I don't mean to sound stupid but who's Carla?" Dimitri said.

I shared a long look with Christian who wrapped his arm around me, "She's our daughter." he said, turning slightly he looked over at the door, that was pushed open a bit and where she was standing. Giving her a smile, she quickly ran over, "Carla honey, this is the man who taught your mother how to fight like she does. His name's Dimitri, he is also Olena's son and Aunty Vika's brother."

Carla's big blue eyes turned to Dimitri and she smiled slightly, "Is nice to meet ou, Dimitchi. Thank ou for teach my mummy to look affa daddy. I loves them heaps."

Watching Dimitri's face and aura for deception, I noticed that while he was surprised, he was genuinely happy and  
pleased. I frowned, trying to think of why he would feel that way.

"I'm happy to meet you little Carla. Trust me when I say, teaching your mother was one of the best times of my life, and I am really sorry to have had that come to an end, she is a wonderful fighter." he smiled sadly, "It's good you love your parents, I have a really strong feeling that they love you too. I was wondering if your mama would come and talk to me?"

Carla looked up at me, "Will you go talk to Dimitchi, mama? He looks sad."

Frowning, I gave Dimitri a look, "Ok honey. But only because you asked, and just this once." I stepped away from Christian and felt his instant anger, Turning to him I gave him a quick kiss on the lips, "We have to have our own talk yet."

Christian nodded, "I'll be waiting right here."

I smiled and followed Dimitri out the back, then frowned yet again about his confusing emotions. We took a seat on the old swing that Yeva and I normally sat on after everyone else was asleep and have a cup of hot chocolate, and a long talk.

"So, what's up Dimitri?" I asked him. "I can tell what your emotions are all over the place, I just can't tell why you feel like that, about whatever it is that you're thinking about. I mean, it's confusing me right now."

"I was thinking about you and Christian being together and I'm glad you found someone that you could rely on and that you're happy. I was also thinking that it was my own fault as to why you were hurting so much that you would go against your own code of honour and I have no one else to blame, I should never have pushed you away like that, I should he told you what Victor had done to me and how Tasha helped him, and for that I am extremely sorry. But I had to heal myself before I could think of telling you the whole truth, I still wanted to be the person you would turn to if you needed anything and things just got so far out of hand, and I found myself hating that you wouldn't leave me alone to heal." he glanced away and I saw a tear run down his face, "It was such a stupid thing to do. I never meant to hurt you like that, and I hated myself more and more each day for the words I said to you. Then the day after I told you, Lissa stopped coming to see me and I had to wonder what I had done wrong, the guards kept giving me dirty looks and finally, after a few days she came and saw me. She looked like hell, there were bags under her eyes and her hair looked like it hadn't been brushed in days, she gave me a small smile and told me that she had started taking her anti-depressants again when I asked her why she simply said that she had 'fucked up in such a big way' and that it was her fault and she couldn't handle the darkness and she didn't want you to have to take it after she had already hurt you so bad. I asked her what she was going on about and she finally said 'she left, I slept with Adrian, biggest mistake ever, and she walked in and she had been crying already she saw us and yelled at us both then she left.' She was still with me when Tasha called and asked her if she knew where Christian had gone, all she had been told was that he had been assigned a guardian and had left on the next flight out."

"Dimitri, I don't-" I started, but he cut me off.

"Please let me finish." He asked and looked at me, I nodded. "She looked confused for a moment before she said 'He left with Rose, they needed to get away from me' and then she just hung up. I asked her how she knew he had and she said that in your departing words to her and Adrian that you were leaving with Lord Ozera, and she had just gotten the other half of her information. As soon as they let me out of my guard detail, I went to see your dad. He looked like hell, he was wearing sweat pants and a shirt. He said that it was his fault and mine, because he had been keeping secrets from you and for the words I said. When I told him that Christian was with you and that you had walked in on Adrian cheating on you with Lissa, he was livid at both of them, but your mum talked him out of having a go at them."

"One thing, Janine isn't my mum." I said, "Now please continue."

'What? Um, we'll talk about that in a minute, I guess? We all looked for you and him but when he came back for a few days, he avoided us until Lissa and Tasha cornered him they both went off at him and he turned back around and went off at them, saying that if Lissa wanted Adrian so much then she can have him, after all one good cheat deserves another, and that if Tasha wanted me then she could have fun with the ex strigoi, because you didn't want me any more and that if she ever said or did anything hurtful to you again, he would personally see to the problem, the problem being her. I watched as Lissa tried to stop crying and I walked over in time to hear her say that she was glad that you had at least one friend that you could depend on and that you were better off with him as your friend instead of herself. He pulled a funny face at her and she looked at him strange before smiling and saying 'I wish you both the best together' and walked away, leaving two very stunned Ozeras. He left the next day, telling Eddie that he was going to see his cousin Becca for a few weeks." he sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, "We didn't hear from either of you, and Eddie and Mia kept disappearing and coming back with tans, smiles and Mia had more muscle tone. Then a couple of weeks ago, at Lissa's induction ceremony she started screaming in pain and no one knew what to do until she stopped screaming in pain and screamed your name, we all thought you were dead. After that Eddie and Mia stopped disappearing and Mia kept crying all the time, especially when she'd see little kids. Then Becca came back to court with your dad and Tasha went off the deep end, trying to get Becca to tell her where Christian was and all Becca would say was 'there was an attack at our house and we got away, we don't know where Christian is now, he wasn't in the car with Abe when we left.' She went and spoke to the queen and they were both really happy about something and she spoke to Mia and she was suddenly so happy. But I guess I now know what they were all talking about. So uh, what were you saying about Janine?"

Trying to get my head around what he had said I replied, "Well fist things first, Mia and Eddie used to come see me and Chris were ever we were staying at the time if they could get time off. Now, Janine. See the thing is, Janine isn't my mother. My birth mother's name was Elizabeth Taylor, she died when I was 3, I didn't really know her all that well. She was killed in a strigoi attack and because dad had me at the time I was spared, he was with Janine and while mum and dad never loved each other, they were close. She wanted a child, dad wanted someone to spend his money on, so they had me. And I think that dad grew to love me more than he lets anyone know." I gave him a sad smile and changed the topic. "What happened with Victor and Tasha, and what relevance did it have to our situation back then?"

"Victor um, compelled me to have feelings for you. I think it was because he wanted me to get between you and Lissa. But when that didn't work the way he wanted it to, he used the charm to expand those feelings and make us lose sight of what was important." he frowned, "Not that loves not important or anything. I just didn't truly feel like that at the time and now I see why I loved you like I did, it was because I felt like you were well, my sister, or family at least. Does that make sense to you?" at my nod he continued, "When Tasha first met you she was furious that you had 'stolen' my heart and she wanted to get her revenge on you, she could see how much you meant to me and used it to her advantage, getting me to hurt you more by staying away from you and spending time with her, even going so far as to make me wait to tell you that I wasn't going to accept her offer." he shook his head.

"So while I loved you with everything I had, your love was a compulsion trick?" I asked, I wasn't angry per-say, I just wanted an answer, "You never felt for me the way I felt for you, even here in Russia?"

"To be completely honest with you Roza, no. I never did, you're family to me." he frowned again, "Does that make you angry?"

"Angry? I thought I would be, but no, I'm not. I just wanted to know whether we even had a chance, but I'm happy with Chris, he makes me feel like, like I don't need to be better, like he loves me the way I am and that's enough for him." I smiled, "I wish that I hadn't been hurt by all this but I know now that if I hadn't been I wouldn't feel this deeply for Chris now."

Looking over at him he smiled, "I'm glad you're happy."

"How's- how's Lissa and-and Adrian?" I asked softly. "I used to ask Mia and Eddie but I haven't seen them in a while."

"Lissa's getting there, she used to on her off days she'd take her medication, on her good days she'd help out in the hospital, healing those that had extreme cases. She misses you and since the bond is gone she, well she went a little over the edge and she's been taking her medication everyday. She still thinks you're dead but the queen refuses to let her hold your funeral. I saw your dad before I left to come here and tell mama that you were gone and he-he smiled at me and all I could think was that he had lost his mind, he had just lost his daughter and he was smiling." he looked at me, "Now I know why he was. Adrian is good, um, do you know about Sydney?"

"No way?" I was stunned, "Sydney Sage?" at his nod, I couldn't stop talking, "Last I heard she turned him down again and he was depressed."

He laughed, "He was, for a week, then he tried again and again. She finally said one date, they went and then all that stuff with you being dead happened and now they are getting hitched. She said life's too short to not follow your heart."

I smiled and leaned on his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around me. Holding me against his side. "You know when I first thought of meeting your family this is how I thought it would be, just us sitting here but things changed and now I have Chris and he makes me so happy." After a few minutes, I turned and smiled up at him, "Almost everything is perfect."

He hugged me, "Yeah, it almost is."

The sound of a throat clearing drew our attention, "Almost perfect huh? How 'bout I leave so it can be then." Christian's snide voice carried over the now silent yard.

Jumping to my feet I turned, "Chris, this is so not what you think."

"Isn't that the same thing that Adrian tried to tell you?" he looked at me, "I so should've listened to my Aunt, but hey everyone falls for Rose and gets hurt by her thorns."

"Chris-"

"I really don't want to hear it." he turned, "I will be back for my stuff and for Carla, I don't want to leave her with you because of your instability."

"Christian Lucas Ozera, I love you. Only you and if you come back and listen to me then you would know!" I was shouting by the end, with tears running down my cheeks, waiting for his reply, but none came. He had already left. Trying to hold myself together, I fell to the ground while huge sobs escaped my chest as I broke.

**Just so everyone knows, I have decided to put in the songs that inspired each chapter I write. Also I would like your opinions on how you think this story will end, I've almost finished it, I just wanna see what you guys are thinking.**

**Thank you!**

**- Kye xoxo**


	14. So Far From Perfect

**CHAPTER 12: So Far From Prefect. **

_Girl With A Broken Heart – Rianna_

I don't know how long I knelt there, crying my heart out. What I did know was everyone had tried to get me to come inside. After several failed attempts they gave up, but Vika sat with me while both Sonja's looked after the children so they didn't see me in my state. Vika talked non-sense until my sobs subsided, her voice soft as she asked me to come inside, but I couldn't think about anything but the hurt and anger on Christian's face as he walked away, telling me he was going to taking our daughter with him.

My sobs started back up at the thought of losing my little girl and I squeezed myself tighter, trying to stop the over whelming fear and hurt from escaping me in the form of body shaking sobs that I couldn't control. In the end I couldn't hold them back, but thankfully, the oblivion of unconsciousness pulled me under, temporally numbing my senses.

Waking up while it was still dark was strange for me, as we lived on human time, but it gave me the illusion that it had all been a dream. That was until I heard Vika's soft voice, talking into her phone. "I'm really worried about her, Niko." she said, "I just wish there was something I could do."

The reply was slightly muffled, but I heard his voice clear as day, "Just be there for her. If she doesn't want hear or talk about certain things then it's best to avoid those topics. She needs to heal from not just his words but from what he's done, and what he's planing on doing."

"Oh, trust me when I say that there is no way in hell I will let him destroy Roza like that." she paused, "He's a great guy and all but I think that when he's hurt he says the first thing that will hurt whoever has hurt him."

"I think you're right. He does sound like a perfect match for Roza, but if he doesn't listen then things can go bad really quick, like they did today."

"I hope she's going to be okay. I don't want to lose her or Carla." Vika's voice had tears in it so I moved around to let her know I was awake, "I gotta go, Niko. Roza's waking up."

"Okay, tell her if she needs us, we're only a phone call away." he replied. "Me, Denis and the gang are coming down in a few days anyway."

"I'll tell her," she paused again, "Be safe. I'll see you soon."

"You too. And that you will. Bye, Vika."

"Bye, Niko." she replied and hung up.

The bed shifted slightly under me and I felt warm arms wrap around me, pulling me back against her chest, holding me tight. I didn't realise until I rolled over to hug her back that I had started crying again.

"Shh, Roza. I'm right here. I promise, I'm not going anywhere." Her voice was soft yet I could feel the conviction in her words, once I had settled down she said "Let's get your mind off all this. How about we start on your plans for getting rid of the spirit users darkness?"

"I was – I was going to see if - if there was an-any way to – like charm things with it or – or use it as a type of magic." I was trying to work with her, trying to stop crying and get my mind off _him_, "The way I see it is fire is the – the opposite of water, earth is the opposite of air. So there's gotta be an opposite to to spirit magic. What if that opposite is the darkness or 'dark magic' and what if like spirit magic it was forgotten?"

"That's some really good questions." she grinned, a far away look in her eyes as she thought about what I said, "So what else?"

"Well since the darkness feels so... um, hostile maybe it was banned because it's an offensive magic only, like spirit is mostly good thus why the darkness builds, so that spirit users who can't use the other elements can have some form of defence too." I was getting excited thinking about the difference reasons why. "I think I need to get into the court archives and read up on it. But in the mean time, I can do some experimentation with Sonja and Oksana."

"Cool as, can I watch?" she asked, "I never would have thought of any of that!"

We were now sitting cross legged on the bed, facing each other and I had a small smile on my face. Vika suddenly jumped up and grabbed my notebook, writing down something as she walked back to the bed, re-taking her place opposite me.

"What are you doing?" I asked, glancing over her shoulder at the page she was writing on. "Why are you writing down my ideas?"

"So that way you don't forget them and so that you can mark off which ones you have tried." She grinned, "Now do you want to make a start on your plans for the house?"

"I'm not sure Christian will let me keep it." I answered truthfully, "We both paid for half but it was supposed to be our home, not just mine."

She nodded, "You can still make plans and if he says you can't have it then it wont hurt anyone, if he says you can then it'll be done already." she gave me a small smile, "I still think that after you talk, he'll say sorry."

Fighting against the tears that threatened to fall I said, "Yeah, like he forgave Lissa for kissing Aaron. No, he thinks that I was going to leave him for Dimitri which, trust me, is worse than a kiss." a few stray tears slid down my cheeks. "He wouldn't listen to me anyway, so I shouldn't get my hopes up only for it to hurt more when he leaves with Carla."

"He's not taking her anywhere." she replied, steel in her voice, "No way is he taking her. Even if I have to sell my soul to your dad, he will not take her." she wiped away my tears.

"I wont let you do that, I'll ask him, since well, he's my dad and all and he wont own my soul." We both chuckled, her at the thought of Abe being evil and me at the thought of him trying to tell me what to do. "Hey, what time is it?"

"Almost 12, why?" She replied.

"I have to call Mia and ask her to ask the Queen if I can use the court library for my research and if I can bring Sonja and you with me."

"Ah, I see then, so you would take me with you to court?" she asked. "Of cause, you're Carla's guardian aren't you? I couldn't leave you behind if she's coming with me, which she will be." I said, picking up my phone and dialling Mia's number, she picked up after the forth ring.

"Hello?" she asked.

"Hey Mia, it's Rose." I said, "What are you doing?"

"Oh. Hey, RB. I'm having coffee with Lissa, do you want me to call you back?" she said. "It shouldn't be too long."

"Um, I just need to ask you a favour." I replied, "Is it just you two or are there others there with you?"

"Hey Eddie, RB really needs to talk to me, will you guys be right for a minute?" she asked away from the phone. "Okay, I'll be a back in a second."

I heard the sound of Mia standing up and the soft voice of Lissa asking who RB was and if they were ok before the door closed and I could only hear the wind and Mia's breathing.

"Right, Rose. It took you long enough to call, Becca told me that you and Chris were 'more than fine' and I'd have to ask you if I wanted to know more. Now what do you need?"

"I need you to go see the Queen and ask her if, when I come back, could I use the court library for research while I'm there. Also could I bring an ex-strigoi and Carla's unofficial guardian." I said.

"Anything else?" she asked.

"Yeah, how've you been?" I asked.

"I'm good, me and Eddie are thinking about getting a bigger place instead of living at my dad's or in his guardian appointed room. We really need our own place."

"Wow, never thought I'd see the day when Mia Rinaldi got serious about anyone, let alone with Castle." I snickered, "When is the wedding?"

Vika gasped and started bouncing up and down on the bed, clapping her hands and giggling.

"Oh, we're not – that is he hasn't asked me yet." She said and I could hear the disappointment in her voice, "But you'll never believe who Lissa's dating!"

"Don't keep me in suspense then, spill!"

"Jesse Zeklos!" she said, "I couldn't believe it!"

"No way!" I was shocked, "You can't believe it? I can honestly tell you I am extremely confused as to how that happened."

"How what happened?" Vika asked.

"Lissa's dating Jesse Zeklos." I said.

"Who's there with you?" Mia asked.

"Vika, do you remember her?" I replied.

"Yeah girl. How are you?" Vika said as I put the phone on speaker. "How's everything going?"

" Oh hey, yeah I remember Vika, how could I forget? How are your family? Things are good here but um, be warned, Dimitri's on his way home to see you."

Vika and I exchanged a look and started laughing, "We know." we both said and and started laughing again.

"How do you know?" she asked.

"He's here already." I said, "He arrived today and we talked."

"Really? How did Christian take that?" Mia asked and with her words my good mood was gone and I didn't want to talk any more.

"Um, I think Roza doesn't want to talk about him at the moment." Vika said.

"Oh. Okay then." Mia replied but I could hear the curiosity in her voice.

"So, uh, can you do that thing I asked you?" I asked her.

"Sure, go see Queen Bitch and ask when you come can you use her library to do research and if you can bring Carla's guardian, which is who by the way?" Mia asked.

"It's a surprise!" I said quickly before Vika could say anything, "But there will be two of them coming."

Vika gave me a look that asked me if I was crazy.

"Sure thing, consider it done." Mia said.

"Thanks, can you also tell my dad that I need to talk to him?" I asked.

"No worries. I gotta go, Jesse just walked into the coffee shop and I wanna see how him and Lis get on."

"Okay but if it looks bad, ask her what would Rose say about this, okay?"

"Okay, later." Mia said, "Bye Vika!"

"Bye!" we both called and I hung up.

"Well, that's different." Vika said, "So uh, who's the other guardian?" she raised an eyebrow at me and folded her arms across her chest.

"Well, I was thinking that Nikolai might want to come join us on our trip to court and keep you company when you're not with Carla and she's with me." I replied, "I know you two get on really well."

"Oh, really?" she asked, "Since when did you know this?"

"Since when I stayed here the first time I could see how much you he cared for you.." I gave her a sad smile, "At least someone should be happy."

"You'll be happy too by the time we leave."

"Yeah, okay. Whatever you say." I shrugged but Vika let it go and we got to work on the plans for the house.

As we worked, Vika kept having to pull my attention back to what we were doing but I was torn. I wanted to get my mind off Christian but he hadn't come back, he hadn't even called. I was really worried about him.

"Roza!" Vika exclaimed, exasperated.

"What would you do if it was Nikolai out there?" I snapped, "How can you expect me to be calm about this? I'm scared he's going to get hurt or die and it'll all be my fault 'cause I didn't go after him."

We were both startled by the bedroom door opening and Yeva walking in, "Now, now girls. There's no need to fight. Vika, you should understand her worry, how many times have you worried about Niko? And Roza, don't fret too much. Chris is fine, he has gone to stay with Oksana and Mark for the night. So don't fear, if anything happens he and Mark will take care of it" she smiled at me and gave me a pat on the arm. "He'll talk to you later."

"How will he talk to me later?" I asked, my heart in my throat, "I don't want to fight with him and I know that if I go then he'll never listen."

"You and Vika are going to take Carla to the park and Sonja and I will go see him. Okay Roza? We will tell him to meet you at the park."

"But will he come?" I couldn't help but ask, I hated the thought of him being mad at me or thinking that I didn't love him or that I was planing on leaving him. I hated that he thought that I cared about him so little as to betray him like that. I couldn't stop the tears from softly sliding down my cheeks and falling into my lap.

"Enough of that now." Yeva said, "It will all work out, you just have to trust in his love for you."

"His words hurt me. Out of everyone who's ever hurt me; physically, emotionally and mentally, his words were the worst. Like a physical pain. I could've dealt with him yelling or even hitting me but the way he spoke, I just - I don't know if he'll ever give me the time of day to tell him what was really happening." I angrily swiped the tears from my face. "He could have let me explain, but he didn't even trust me enough to listen! I mean, how could he... how dare he! It was fine for him to say what he wanted, but then he just walked away like I wasn't worth his time or effort!"

"Roza?" Vika asked, "Are you -?"

I could feel the darkness wrapping around me, making my sadness dissipate and my anger grow. "Don't Vika. I'm sick of it."

"Sick of what, Roza?" she asked.

"Sick of stupid men always hurting me!" I cried, "Yeah, Dimitri was turned and broke my heart. But he hurt me more when he was turned back and said 'Love fades, mine has.' Then Adrian cheated on me with Lissa and I found out that my dad lied to me all my life and Mason died because of me and left me alone to deal with the fall out, Eddie blamed me for ages because Mase had gone back for me! And-and now Christian l-left me and is going to take away my baby girl and-and probably wont let me see her again!"

The darkness was making me so angry and I wanted to be angry. It was easier to fight when I was angry. I couldn't see properly, there was a shadow across my vision, but I could see Vika and Yeva's auras, but of them were scared but neither of them meant me harm. So I took deep breaths and pushed the darkness away, making the anger fade and letting the sadness come back to the front of my mind.

"I'm sorry. I let the darkness get the better of me when I shouldn't have." I said, hanging my head in shame. "I'll leave if you want, Yeva."

"No Roza, it's fine. You didn't mean it and all you did was yell." She hugged me, "We still love you and besides everyone else here yells too, so it wouldn't be very fair on you."

I gave a nervous laugh. "Thanks, Yeva. I just really don't know what to do."

"Just go to bed for now and in the morning take Carla to the park. Sonja and I will do the rest." Yeva said. "Don't worry about a thing."

"Are you sure?" I asked, "I can go and -"

"No it's okay, we have some things to talk to him about and a couple of things to show him." she replied. "Now sleep. And since Sonja's in Vika's bed, she's sharing with you."

"Okay then, we'll go to sleep." I smiled, "Share the bed or sleep on the floor, 'cause I ain't moving, Vika."

"I'll share with you. The floor isn't comfortable!" she laughed, "Just don't snore!"

"I don't snore!" I said as I grabbed some clothes to get changed into in the bathroom.

"Yeah, right, so it was Tam that was snoring that night in Novabrisk?" she asked with a laugh.

"Actually, it was! " I said as I went into the bathroom. "She snores like a chainsaw cutting down a rainforest!" I called through the door. She laughed and I came back out to her in shorts that were purple and covered in little pink hearts and a singlet that had 'love me, or else!' written on it, sitting on the bed laughing. I snorted and she looked at me funny until I pointed at our clothes. "We match!" I laughed and she began laughing again. I jumped into the bed.

"Do you really think that I will be a good guardian for Carla?" she asked. "I mean, I just want to know if you think that or if it's just 'cause you think you owe me."

"I really think that you are the best guardian to look after Carla. I wouldn't trust her with anyone else because I know you'll always look out for her, even when I am there with you guys too." I grinned at her, "Worried already Vika?"

"No, I just want to make sure that you are completely happy with the way this is." she grinned back at me. "Now, off to bed. Hopefully tomorrow is a better day for us all."

"Good night Vika." I said and pulled up my side of the sheets.

"G-night Rose." she replied, pulling up her own side and turning off the lamp beside the bed. "See you when I get up."

"Sure thing." I said and watched as sleep pulled her under. But I couldn't sleep yet, I was too tied up in thinking about Christian. I wanted to know for myself if he was okay, if he did really hate me because he misunderstood what he had heard of our conversation and taken what he had seen the wrong way.

Picking my phone back up of the mahogany bedside table, I dialled a number I knew so well I didn't have to look it up and waited for Christian to answer his phone. It rang

and rang

and rang, then went to message bank. So I tried again and again, on the fourth time I called the automatic voice said that his phone had been switched off or was unavailable. I felt a sob build in my chest and fought back my tears. I just wanted to talk to someone, anyone who understood how I was feeling.

Thinking through all my friends there was only one person who would understand and he had always given me advice in the past. But there was also something I wanted to try, something that I had only ever been on the receiving end of.

Pulling up my magic, I concentrated like Lissa used to and focused my mind on trying to reach someone who was asleep. It was strangely easy as I felt the magic form around me reaching out, seeking someone to connect me to and I had a sudden thought, Adrian. _Pay backs a bitch, fucker,_ I thought. I had to find out if it was true that he was getting married to Sydney.

Pushing the magic towards him I found it easy and soon the spirit dream materialised around me, a beautiful garden filled with masses of different types of flowers, but only one rose blooming near a fountain. Turning around I watched as the plants swayed in the dream breeze. I glanced at what I was wearing and was glad to see I was wearing just a normal T-shirt and cut-offs.

"Rose?"

Spinning around again, I laughed at the look of confusion on Adrian's face. I walked over to the fountain he was sitting beside.

"I could've sworn I was asleep, not dream walking. I'm sorry if you don't want to see me. But it seems I can't break the dream." He frowned. "Are you holding me here?"

"Actually, yes. But then it's my dream so, I think I can do whatever I want to you, including dress you in an Easter Bunny costume. But I don't think I will." I sat down next to him. "It has been brought to my attention that no one over there knows that Chris and I are very much alive and that I'm back in my own body now."

"And that means what Rose? You're confusing me." he replied.

"It means that I have had the device removed from my arm so I can get my magic back and reclaim my name. The experiment is now over." I looked up at the sky, "So beautiful here. Oh and I heard about you and Sage, congratulations. I knew she'd give in eventually, just didn't expect it so soon."

"What are you going on about? And how the hell do you know about Sydney and I?"

"Let's see, I saw Dimitri and he told me. And when I say told me, I mean he told me everything about how he felt and everything and then I spoke to Mia and she told me about Lissa and Jesse and finally I decided to see if it was all true and well you confirmed the engagement, now I just have to go see someone else and harass him until he tells me what I want to hear, actually I think I'm just gonna go to sleep."

"Wait!" he called as I stood, "How are you here when I'm not the one that's – I just – I don't get it. What experiment?"

Sitting back down I looked at him, "Do you really want to know?"

"Yes, why wouldn't I want to know?" he asked.

"Ok, I'll tell you if you promise not to tell Lissa that I'm alive -"

"Lissa and I don't really talk any more. She blames me as much as herself for you leaving." he looked away, "Why did you leave Rose? What was the whole reason for you just packing up and walking away from everything you had worked so hard for?"

"Honestly. My dad lied to me my whole life, Janine's not my real mum, Dimitri broke part of my heart, you broke the only part I had left, Lissa destroyed my trust and killed our friendship, Eddie was quietly blaming me for Mason's death, but now he understands why Mase did what he did, Mia was never there and wasn't interested in anything more than the next 'flavour of the month' and the only person who stood by me no matter what, gave me the option of leaving all the pain and heart ache behind and to start over with new friends and a clean slate." I smiled sadly, "All in all, it was almost everyone I had ever trusted in my life. Wow, the darkness is getting worse by the second and making my emotions go haywire."

"I know what you mean." he said and gave me a smile, "So who stood by you?"

"Wow, I thought you would know all the goings on in court."

"Not really when me and Sydney live in Palm Springs." He gave me a small smile, "I found out that she got assigned there and so I moved there to get to know her better and well, let's just say when you first get to know her she's a book then she kinda explodes and you go 'whoa, where the hell did that come from?' And you see that though she's a book, it's a pop-up book about fireworks and explosions."

"Good, I'm glad to see that you're happy."

"So who was it?"

"Christian Ozera." I said softly, hiding my sadness.

"Lissa's ex-boyfriend?" he shook his head, "I thought you and him hated each other."

"Yeah, not really. Just in denial that we were almost completely the same." I looked up at his face, "You'll never guess what though."

"You have a secret love child with Christian?"

"How the hell did you know?" I asked, shocked.

"I didn't! But really?" he asked the shock written all over his face.

"Yeah." I could see the information slowly sinking into his brain, "We have a daughter named Carla Marie Ozera-Bardica. She's an angel and has this aura that shines so bright that I can't look directly at her or I'd go blind."

"You have a daughter? That's named Ozera-Bardica? And you can see her aura?" he was beginning to lose the thread of our conversation from information over load.

"Yes, yes and yes." I said nodding, "I gotta go but I will talk to you again another day if you want, just please don't tell anyone what I told you, please?"

"Okay, Rose. Can I go to sleep now?" he asked.

"Yeah, sorry." I giggled and let the dream start to fade, "Now you know how I felt, I might have been asleep but it still felt like I had been woken up."

He nodded and I let the dream fully fade, leaving him to his sleep and drifting off into my own piece of dark happiness.


	15. The Strength of Our Bond

**CHAPTER 13: The Strength of Our Bond**

_Art Of Love – Guy Sebastian, feat. Jordan Sparks_

"Is this seat taken?" his soft voice made me jump.

I had been biting my bottom lip, waiting for him to show up, so scared that he wouldn't. Yet here he was and I couldn't bring myself to look at him. I was still scared. We had been here almost all day after all and at Yeva's urging we had brought a picnic for the three of us for lunch.

"Rose?" he asked. And I finally looked up at him, hearing his swift intake of breath, I realised I must look pretty shitty today. I gave him a small smile.

Getting up this morning, I had gone for my normal run and shower, I hadn't bothered brushing my hair, I had just pulled it up into a bun. But I had broken down in the shower, thinking that he wouldn't show up and again while Vika and Carla ate their lunch after Carla had asked where her daddy was. Hell even now I was surprised he had showed up at all.

"Can I sit with you?" he asked and this time I nodded, a quick jerk of my head as if I was too scared to let him out of my sight and he dropped onto the bench. "Yeva told me that you needed to talk to me? She said that I had to hear you out because I was being stupid by not letting you tell me what really happened. Well that and a few other things but I just need to listen now and talk later."

"Chris." I glanced away then back to his pale face, waiting for him to either disappear or to start yelling at me again. "It wasn't what you thought it was. I said that things were almost perfect because Mikhail doesn't know that Sonja is fine and that she is ready to go back to court."

"And the hug?" he asked, looking at where Vika was playing with Carla. "Did it mean anything to you? Do you still feel that spark with him?"

"No, it didn't mean anything to either of us." I looked up at him, "I only feel that spark with you. You light up my life and repaired the holes in my heart."

"So how does he feel about all this?" he asked looking back into my eyes.

"He feels like I'm family, Chris. I love you more than I have ever loved anyone, believe me when I say that, he hugged me because I told him that even though he had hurt me, I was glad he did, because you and I wouldn't be together and we wouldn't have Carla." I sighed, "You are the only one for me, and I will do anything to prove it, but I am not saying sorry for hugging someone that amounts to my brother in my eyes. You have nothing to worry about from him."

Sitting at the park with Christian while Vika and Carla played, I waited for him to reply, after all he was the one that had to apologise, not me. The sun was just leaving the sky and I hoped he had listened to what I had said.

"I'm sorry, I just- I'm scared that I'm not good enough for you, I mean. You can fight, really well, you have this amazing magic and there's the fact that you're like a warrior goddess and I'm just me, the strigoi's boy." he sighed and looked up at the sky, "Then there's Dimitri, he's 6'7, tan, muscular and is deemed a 'God' by everyone who's ever seen him fight and I'm barely 6'4, paler than a cloud, have barely any muscle tone and I'm the wanna be strigoi, that has no parents and is a royal but even then is still a nobody. I mean how could you even think to pick me?"

"I don't care about those things, physical things. I love you because you're smart, funny, sarcastic, you never let anyone get to you, you looked after me and let me look after you, you taught me that not everyone is going to tell you what you want to hear, but you don't keep thinks from me and most important of all," I made him look at me, "You've never gone out of your way to hurt me. While we may have our differences you've never kept things from me to hurt me, you don't try to shelter me from everything. You're you, and that's the man that took me away from all the people who hurt me to give me time to heal and get past the things they did. It's because of that that I think I can handle seeing them all again, because you make me stronger. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have called my dad and Carla would've been taken from us both."

"Well, I um. I'm glad I make you feel like that." he gave me a small smile, "Are we okay? Or um, do you want some space?"

"Space wouldn't be good right now. I was so worried about you all night last night, until Yeva told me Mark and Oksana had taken you in." I frowned, "Don't ever do that to me again, I was so scared. Russia is notorious for strigoi and really dangerous, I'm not saying you can't take care of yourself, I'm saying that even with back up, I still got taken by Dimitri when he was evil, remember?"

He nodded, "Will do. Hey Vika, What are you doing?"

"I just got a text from Karo, says come home now. Do you want me to take Carla so you can finish you talk?" she asked, walking back with Carla, nudging her and whispering in her ear. "We can tell the other kids about how we escaped the evil red-eyed monsters!"

"Oh, yeah. Peas mummy and daddy, I can go with Aunty Vika?" She pulled a puppy dog face at me. "Pwetty peas?"

Laughing, We nodded, "But be careful." I said and they both nodded.

Christian's eyes found mine, "So, what happens now?"

"Do you still love me?" I asked.

"I think I will always love you, Rose." he gave me a soft smile and blushed, "I love you more than I ever loved Lissa."

I smiled at him, "You didn't answer my question."

"Yes, I do love you." he said.

"Then we're back together, if you want?" at his nod I continued, "Not that we should've been apart in the first place."

His soft hands enveloped mine and he leaned towards me and kissed me softly, our lips moved together as if they were made for each other and I felt that familiar sense of completion that I only felt with Chris. I stood up and pulled him with me, "Race ya home?" I said and took off, not waiting for his answer. But he caught me soon after.

We walked down the road, watching the sunset, our hands linked together, "I love you." I said, thinking this was the corniest thing ever but still the best.

"I love you too." he replied. "I'm glad you can forgive me for being so stupid."

"Yeah, I'm glad you let me explain. But you need to trust me more, okay? I'm not Lissa."

"And don't I know it. I will, I should've listened but I was hurt by the thought that we had just got together and you didn't even want to be with me." he stroked the side of my face, "I hated being away from you last night, I- to be completely honest I didn't sleep at all, thinking about the look on your face, the devastation in your voice as I walked away. I should've -"

"We can say 'I should've -' blah blah blah all night, but the fact is it's done now and in the past so we should move on from it, it can only make us stronger now." I smiled at him and he took a hold of my hand again and we kept walking down our street.

"Get out, I don't want you here!"

"You heard my mama, get the fuck out and don't come back. We don't want you here! You think you would have got the point when Dimitri kicked you out!"

Glancing at Christian, we both broke into a run, bolting for the house as a car turned into the driveway. I didn't stop to see Dimitri getting out the of car or the look of anger and fear on his face. I rushed into the kitchen where there was yelling emanating, I saw a broken vase and a photo on the ground. Glancing down at the photo in passing, I saw that it was one of Dimitri and Ivan, so it was taken before Ivan passed. The boys were smiling at the camera, their faces squished together as one or the other was holding the camera.

Pushing through the door to the hall I thought, _If someone broke that by accident, it would have been cleaned up by now, if that was what had been broken._ The sound of breaking glass sent me running into the kitchen, it was almost dinner time, and everyone one was normally there. I dashed through the deserted dinning room and slowed, _where is everyone? _My mind screamed.

"Get the hell away from my mother you sick bastard!"

Shoving open the door to the kitchen I could see Olena backed up into the corner, her hands held out before her in the age old sign of surrender, while a man with brown hair streaked with grey, wide shoulders and a fair few wrinkles kicked Vika across the room.

"I told you that I would be back, you're mine and I don't share with anyone, let alone your ungrateful brats!" he spat at Olena, not realising I was in the room, "Now, do I have to teach you another lesson, or are you going to do as you're told?"

"Like fuck I'm going let you lay a hand on her, Michael." I said. "I'm only going to say this once, get the fuck out."

He turned to me and laughed, "What are you going to do little girl? Push me and break a nail then cry?"

His words made my darkness spring to the front of my mind, making me see red. I didn't care that this was Vika, Sonja, Karo and Dimitri's father and their kids grandfather, all that mattered was he hurt people I loved, and that I could never tolerate.

His laughter was mocking me so I had to shut him up, the darkness flooding my system making me think less and act on my first impulse . My fist slammed into the side of his head, snapping it to one side. He shut up then lunged at me, trying to grab my hand like he had with Viktoria, I quickly side stepped him and hit him in between his shoulders. I saw his fist coming at me but I wasn't quick enough this time and he hit me in the face, making me stumble back, I kicked low, hitting him in the knee and knocking him off balance. As he went down he grabbed the bench and started throwing random things off the bench at me, I felt the cut of the knife on my shoulder and winced in pain, making the mistake of looking at it. He made his move and punched me again and again, making black dots dance across my vision.

He finally stopped hitting me and I heard a grunt, looking up I saw Dimitri grab his arm, forcing him to step back from me, but Michael had a trick up his sleeve that neither of us had given a second thought to. I watched in horror as Dimitri's arm started smoking and Dimitri's face crumpled in pain.

Unthinking, I quickly jumped up off the floor and slammed my fist into his face again and again, making him lose his concentration and letting go of Dimitri. I hit him on his chest and again on his arms, hitting his pressure points so he couldn't use his magic again, something I had learnt in my travels. I had made him back up against a wall when he pulled down one of the pictures and threw it at me, I barely managed to duck before he moved towards me, but I had had enough. Grabbing his shirt I spun him towards the back door; I didn't want to break anything more inside.

He snarled and swung at me again, this time only missing by inches as I had to step towards him to get him out the door. My fist hit the side of his ribs and he grabbed them, showing me that I had done a lot of damage to him. I pushed him hard and he fell out the back door and down the steps, into the rain that had begun to fall from the now dark night sky.

"Listen up you good-for-nothing, low-life, scum-bag; if I ever see you here again, make that if I hear that you've come here or even walked or drove past this house, I will make your life a living nightmare!" my chest was heaving and I was having trouble holding myself back from hitting him again, "Do you understand that arse hole or is that to much?"

He shuddered from where he was but I could see the bravado in his eyes, "Oh, really and who do you think you are to threaten me?"

"My name is Rose Mazur, and I swear to all that is holy I will rip you limb from limb if you so much as think about this family again, because I know for damn sure you are not a part of it any more, nor will you ever be again!" I screamed at him. "Now get the fuck off this property and don't come back!"

"And if she doesn't I will!" Dimitri said from behind me. "Now get lost!"

He scrambled to his feet through the pain he was bound to be feeling and glanced over my shoulder at something that made his fear grow exponentially, and ran out the side gate and down the drive. The fear in his eyes when I said my name was as clear as day and my threat made him even worse, Dimitri's words and his presence made him even more scared. I waited for the gate to swing shut before turning to Dimitri and giving him a weak smile. I quickly walked up the steps and pulled back his sleeve, showing the extent of his burns.

"We need to get that looked at soon." I said and looked up at him.

He brushed a strand of hair back from my face and frowned, "Are you ok Roza?" he asked, looking at where Michael had hit me.

"I'm fine, really. Okay, I just- Oh God! Vika!" I said and bounced up the rest of the stairs and into the kitchen, "Vika!"

"She's on the lounge mama's with her." Karo said from where she was cleaning up the broken glass, "Thank you for getting rid of him, Roza. I-I couldn't do it, if he had hurt me like Vika, Paul would have tried to step in and he would've got hurt, you understand that, don't you?" she had tears in her eyes at the thought.

"I understand you completely, Karo. He's big, but he's still a kid." I gave her a small smile as I walked into the lounge room.

"Oh, Vika." I said as I looked over to where Olena was holding her hand, tears running down her face. Looking at her face I could already see the bruises forming on her softly tanned skin and blood trickling out of the corner of her mouth and nose.

Moving swiftly across the room I grabbed Vika's other hand. I couldn't believe that someone could do this much damage to their own flesh and blood, their own child. I shuddered thinking about what he could've done to the little kids if he had gotten a hold of them. What he had done to me too.

"Roza, can you do anything? Can you help my baby girl?" Olena begged me, "Please, I'll do anything, give you anything -"

"Olena stop, I wont take anything from you. Vika's like a sister to me." I replied. I pulled at my magic and frowned, focusing the light into her barely breathing body, praying that I was in time to heal her properly.

The first wave of happiness hit me and I pushed harder, watching as her breathing began to stabilise and her heart picked up to it's normal beat. I pulled back a bit and focused on making sure there was no lasting damage done to her. When I was done I fell back onto my bum and took a deep breath.

My eyes glanced up to where Christian was running down the stairs; Carla, Zoya, Aleski and Paul following him. His eyes landed on me and I could see the shock and concern written on his face as he rushed across the room cursing that Sonja had stayed at Oksana and Mark's after getting him.

"The rest is up to her, I did all I could." I said as Olena nodded and Christian pulled me up off the floor. "She should wake up soon, her heartbeats getting stronger."

Christian held me against his chest as Vika's eyes fluttered then opened, "Where? What?" She shook her head, "Okay what happened?"

"You were protecting me from Michael and he threw you across the room." Olena started, "Roza got him to leave."

"Roza," she said, looking over at me, "You healed me too, huh?"

"Yeah, it was pretty bad Vika." I said, "But it's okay. I don't mind healing anyone here. Even mister really confused, over there by the door."

Everyone looked up to see Dimitri frowning at me and Vika, "How did you heal Vika if you're a damphir? We don't get magic."

Christian burst out laughing, "Sorry, sorry. But that's so funny. We've all known for weeks and none of us thought to tell him, or Lissa, hell even the queen knows!" After his words he cracked up laughing again and soon Yeva, Karo, Sonja and the 4 children joined him.

"It's like this Dimitri, when I was 5 my parents and I came to the conclusion that in order for the queen to see that moroi could be as strong as damphirs, we had to have one pretend to be a damphir. Now due to the fact that there was, mind you I said _was_, a glitch in my DNA, I didn't have to drink blood, this lead to me being the perfect candidate for the 'thing' to be put in. So mum charmed a 'thing' and they put it under my skin" I glanced at Yeva, and she nodded for me to continue, "A while ago I got into a fight and I got a cut over the skin where it was placed, Vika, unthinkingly grabbed me right in the same spot which pushed it out, causing me to revert back to being a moroi. The only problem being I had internal damage and died, only to have Carla drag my soul back from the shadow lands. Because of the nature of Carla's magic, she isn't bonded to me. She found a way to bring people back without becoming their bond mate."

"So, you're moroi?" he asked, "And you've been training like the guardians and have a promise mark."

Sighing, I nodded. "I am a guardian still, I just have several gifts that they don't." I glanced at Christian, "I'm still Christian's guardian, and if Olena says that it's fine, Vika is going to become Carla's guardian."

Olena nodded, "If that is what she wishes, then I see no point in trying to stop her as she would just leave and wouldn't come home if I did." she smiled. "You have your first application for assignment Vika."

Vika grinned and hugged Olena, "Thanks mama, this means so much to me! And seeing as Rose doesn't live too far away I can always bring Carla here to see you."

"Well I guess I should say, thank you Roza, for helping get him out of mama's house." Dimitri said, followed by murmurs from Olena, Vika, Sonja, Karo, Paul and even Yeva. "We are in you debt."

"No, I didn't just do it for you family, I did it for mine too, you guys are all like family to me, and then there's the fact that Carla's here." I replied, "I couldn't let her get hurt by strigoi what makes you think I would've let him be anywhere near her?"

Christian hugged me into his chest and bushed my hair back from my face, "I'm gonna call Oksana and tell her what happened and see if they can help heal you, I know you used a lot of magic to heal Vika, you're really pale."

"Fine, but I will heal him and then I'll go for a sleep after one of the girls have healed me." I looked up at him, "Okay?"

"Yeah, I'll organise that while you heal him." he nodded and leaned down and pressed his lips to each of the cuts and bruises on my face. "Even covered in bruises you still look beautiful to me. I'm glad we worked things out."

"Me too. I missed you last night." I said and hugged him as tightly as I could even though it hurt me. "Don't do it again!"

"Yes boss, not. You love me the way I am." he chuckled and I shoved at his chest as I walked over to Dimitri and pulled his sleeve back up and placed my hand on his arm pushing my magic in and healing the burns so there wasn't even a scar left behind.

"Done. Now, what did we learn?" I asked him as if I was his teacher.

"Don't grab a fire user or other wise stop him or her from doing what they want when they are angry." he replied, "And if you do, have a spirit user friend on hand in case of emergencies so they can heal you before any one sees."

We all laughed and the kids grinned at Carla who flicked her eyebrows at me. "Yeah, mummy. Like you or me!" she laughed.

Grinning, I nodded. "Like us baby, but you shouldn't fight with moroi if you can help it. They are a part of our lives. But we should still be grateful to our damphir counterparts because without them most of us wouldn't be here."

She smiled, "Like Aunty Vika and Olena."

"Yeah baby. Any who, I'm going to lay down while I wait for the girls." I glanced at where Christian was on the phone and smiled. "I really need to lay down."

Olena hugged me and I gave everyone a wave as I walked up the stairs and towards mine and Sonja's room. As I walked down the hall a slight dizziness swamped my head, making me reach out to the wall for support. _To much, to soon. But I had to heal Vika or she would've died, _I thought_, and Dimitri stopped Michael from hurting me too much, so I had too heal him too._

Grasping the door handle, I tried to turn it and found myself fumbling, unable to even open the door. It was getting to the point I was completely leaning on the wall and was about to give up and slide down the wall, just so I could get off my feet, when I felt a strong arm wrap around me, lifting me slightly and opened the door for me.

Lifting my head I looked up into Christian's eyes. "Told you, you needed to lay down. I'm glad I came up when I did." he said while he walked me over to the bed, pulling back the covers and helped me in, "Sonja and Oksana are both coming over. I told them about the fight and Oksana is going to talk to Olena about what happened and Sonja said she would be the one to heal you. How is that? Better?"

"Yeah. Thanks, Chris." I smiled up at him and patted the other side of the bed. "Lay with me for a moment?"

He kicked off his shoes and lay down next to me, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me back against his chest. "Once the house is fixed up we can do this every night." I felt his soft breath in my hair, "Do you still want to see it?"

"See what?" I asked, looking up at his face.

"My tattoo. The one that we, we spoke about on our way to get Carla." he said softly. "I wanted to know if you still wanted to see it."

"Um, yeah okay. That is if you want to show me." I gave him a small smile. "Come on then, show me the cause of our 'discussion.'" I watched as he pulled his shirt up over his head and gasped when I saw his tattoo.

"If you don't like it I can get it removed. I know you don't really -"

"It's perfect the way it is, Chris."

And it was. Covering the left side of his chest was a blood red rose, surrounded by a mess of vines and had a scroll through the middle that had my name on it. On the vines were four large leaves one of which had Carla Marie written on it with her date of birth.

"It's beautiful, Chris. How did you hide that from me?" I asked my fingers running over the vines, tracing their paths from the centre to the leaves. "Why only four leaves? There's so many vines but only four leaves."

"I was hoping to have four kids some day." he glanced away. "When I got this I saw Carla as my daughter, but I didn't know she actually was." he looked back at me and smiled. "I want to give Carla some siblings, but if you don't want to have any more I can live with just having Carla."

"Are you kidding me right now?" I asked. "Of cause I want more kids! But I only want them with you. You are such a silly boy!"

He smiled at me and I could see the joy in his eyes, "Really? Only me?"

"I'm sure I've said that before." I laughed and yawned as I felt the darkness of sleep sneak up on me, "I think I'm gonna be out before Sonja gets here."

"That's fine." he said as I closed my eyes, sleep pulling me under. "I'll be right here."


End file.
